So I don’t have a lot of issues with talking or conversing, I can keep up a conversation for a while, the problem is when it’s the next day and whoever I’m talking to doesn’t start a conversation, I feel like I should start another one instead, but how do I do that shit? It’s scary as hell bro. Like just ignoring them is rude, and what if they get the wrong idea? What if they think I don’t like them just because I don’t have the balls to initiate a conversation? Cause I like talking to people, it’s always fun hearing about people’s interests and being able to share mine, but goddamn trying to start the next one is just so impossible for me. My thumb will be shiverin and quiverin over the damn send button and then I just close whatever messenger app I’m on cause what if I do it wrong? What if I start off with the wrong sentence, or topic? And also like what if they don’t want to talk at that moment, and I might just be disturbing them? Or maybe they’ll think I’m creepy or obsessive if I do which makes zero sense but you know? But I don’t want them to think I hate them or something, and I can’t even bring this whole problem I have with socializing up because I can’t even begin socializing and even when I do have the chance to explain I just feel like I’m complaining or expecting them to make up for my nervousness. No one likes people who complain and I don’t want people to think I expect things from them, but then again, it’s also just this massive loophole that doesn’t have an end, my brain’s sliding through a damn klein bottle, I just can’t figure out how to act normally. And hints bro, hints are even worse because I hate hints, and I know how hard it is to pick them up sometimes, so I avoid hints because they just feel douchey in a way and what if they don’t get it or what if the whole thing is misunderstood and then I’ll have to do more explaining and make a situation that I want to avoid? It’s a lot, goddamn it’s way too much.
Anyway, sorry for the rant, but I really just don’t know how to or have the courage to start a conversation with anybody, and would really like to know if any of you could help me with it.
TL;DR – I like talking to people but when they don’t start a conversation I panic because I want to talk to them but I also don’t know how to start a conversation because the whole thing is confusing and I also just don’t have the courage to even try, and I think that if I keep “ignoring” them that they’ll get the wrong idea and start thinking that I hate them.