We are currently on a family vacation with another family. We have a 15mth old and a 3yr old and they have been struggling to adjust to their new environments; plus my 3yr old is sharing a room with our friends 3yr old.
Our friends only have 1 child; pregnant with #2, so they tag team taking care of their little one and giving each other down time.
My husband on the other hand seems to think I’m pestering him if I ask for him to stick around or take both.
Both kids have been waking at night, our LO only settles sometimes after a breastfeed so I’m the only one who wakes but my eldest will ask for one or both of us.
This morning I took the kids, made breakfast and got them dressed while he had a shower and took close to an hour to get ready. By the time he was done everyone was rushing to get out to go our scheduled outting. I barely had time to brush my teeth and change my clothes.
I don’t know how to deal with it. This is my holiday too!! I’ve been back full-time since LO was 6mths, I’ve had a crazy work schedule for the last month, my husband was away for work for 2 weeks last month and I did everything on my own. I feel like I’m expected to make sure everyone else has fun but no one is looking out for me?!?
He just took a 2.5hr nap with our eldest, but by the time they woke I’d just popped LO down for a short 45min and decided I’d go rest. Instead of waiting like I’d asked he took our eldest out and sure enough LO woke after 20mins screaming and he was nowhere to be found. When I called him, he came back to pick LO up but was frustrated that I’d inconvenienced him and was obviously annoyed with me but didn’t even understand my frustraion/exhaustion or want to listen to me. I’m the bad guy again?!?
1 comment
It’s hard! When you’re exhausted and stressed you don’t see your partner is struggling as much as or more than you – the blinkers go on. Since having our daughter me and my husband have had to apologise to eachother more than once for not seeing how the other needed our support because we felt unsupported too. Talk to him and tell him that you understand that he’s doing a lot but you are actually struggling and need more from him and need him to appreciate how much you’ve been doing. Sometimes even the best ones need a reality check.