I’ve only ever slept with two men, my ex boyfriend and the guy I’m currently seeing. Sex with my ex took some getting used to, he was roughly the size of a can of red bull, but once we figured things out it was great.
The guy I’m currently seeing isn’t as impressive. I wouldn’t say he’s tiny, but significantly smaller. I tad bigger than my Roku tv remote. I’m trying not let it affect me because he’s a great guy but there are times he puts me in really awkward positions.
Ex: sometimes when he initiates sex he’ll ask me if I’m ready to be “stretched out”.
Like wtf do I say in response to that?!? I’m pretty this is coming from him being insecure, but I have no idea how to approach the situation. I want to compliment him and boost his confidence to improve the sex, but I don’t think I call him “big” with a straight face.
What do I say?
Tl;dr: guy I’m seeing has a small penis but is fishing for compliments
16 comments
So then give him compliments without talking about his size? You obviously enjoy having sex with him so… tell him that in the moment? You’re over complicating it a bit. You don’t have to lie to give someone a genuine compliment
Bruh. It seems like your ex has ruined sex for you. It’s most likely going to be mediocrity from here on out. Also, you’re 18. Fuck around and look for another dude that can blowout your back. Gonna be hard to find one that will stay, but unless you are willing to stay in a committed relationship with only *meh* sex, you are going to have to look *HARD*. Most men aren’t hung like a horse, with the sexual prowess of a seasoned pornstar.
Honestly your BF sounds like he’s overcompensating. Guys usually have a general idea of where they stack up size-wise, and any guy who does not have a big penis who says cringe like “are you ready to be stretched out?” have some major insecurity issues.
I honestly don’t know what you should say because anything you do attempt will sound patronizing.
Just tell him that his dirty talk needs a bit of work and being stretched out isn’t a turn on.
The dirty talk sounds kinda cringey to me. Tbh most guys I’ve had are around your bfs size and I don’t find an issue with them. I had one guy that was like your ex and it was hella uncomfortable. I prefer my remotes ty. I wouldn’t mention penis size unless it’s complimentary. I feel like guys that age are more sensitive.
It’s wonderful that you are here and looking for ways to help make sex better and not bruise his ego. I applaud that. That said, sex is a chemistry thing and insecurities hurt sex a lot. You may need to sit down and share how you feel he may be insecure and that he doesn’t need to be. Tell him he is a good lover and that his biggest weakness is his constant desire to discuss just his cock. Tell him it would be much better if he focused on many other things and just enjoyed PIV sex with out the need to discuss dick size and/or stretching you out.
Your boyfriend’s penis is not “smaller” it is average. Your ex is on the freakishly large end of the scale. It may just be that your current partner is not great at using what he’s got, but what he’s got is about what most guys are working with.
First of all, tell your current boyfriend not to say stupid things like, “ready to get stretched out.” Surefire way to give girls “the ick.”
Sounds like he’s an inexperienced sex partner. Guide him verbally during the act “I like this, this position isn’t working for me, try this, etc” It’s not really about the size for most women.
Between the post and your comments there under, my advice would be to let this guy go. Find someone you are sexually compatible with. Nobody should be sticking around of “okay” sex, especially as young as you are.
Call it “fun size” –like they do with candy bars.
Oh, goodness, please do not call it fun size like someone suggested. The man will never ever recover lol like he might just fall down and die right in front of you.
Some encouraging, non lying, responses to his come on line would be things like:
Mmm…I love feeling you inside me
Oh yeah, I love it when you fill me up
Ohh Im so ready for you
He looking for that kind of response, not an honest size convo – which you can never ever have!! Never ever ever lol
(You can also try to guide his sexy talk to something thats better for you, like, I love it when you say xyz…)
You’re 18.. sounds to me like the sex just isn’t good. Size doesn’t usually matter. I would bring up to him things you like, and tell him his dirty talk just isn’t working. Lol
I don’t know why but the way you picked red bull and roku made me laugh.
He knows he is hung like the statue of David and is looking for you to hang yourself by being honest. A guy this delusional you can either play along with or have the heart to heart and risk he gets butt hurt. If you choose the heart to heart just be gentle about it
Unless he flat out asks you then You don’t have to mention size you can just mention not liking that particular language, referring to being stretched out. If he doesn’t respect your boundaries then you have bigger problems than the smaller problem. (Sorry couldn’t help it)
size doesn’t necessarily make the sex better tho ive had better sex with a man who was average sized than with a man with a big one but if you’re not sexually satisfied tou should talk to him about it. and also i think it’s best if you stop comparing him to your ex