Does sex increase with age and does it get better?

23 comments

1. Your binary solution set doesn’t work. It may or may not increase with age but that doesn’t mean she is losing interest in you.

2. The higher odds are that it won’t increase.

3. Tell her to take a blood test & check her testosterone levels. Testosterone decreases with age. Test is a vital hormone for men & women. I am on test therapy, my sex drive is slowly increasing again.

4. I’d say that sex life gets better, as long work on it. You have to communicate your needs constantly and be open with each other. Have you been adding something new to your relationship, like toys, or exploring new kinks?

5. Ours increased in duration but decreased in frequency. 2 or 3 times a week but 45 minutes to well over an hour.

   As far as the better goes, indescribably better.

6. We are 53m 62f. We still go at it pretty much something almost everyday. I don’t have any hobbies.

7. Me(36f) and my husband(m35) have been together for 10 years, and when we first got together, we had lots of sex and it was pretty good. We don’t have PiV sex as much anymore,(he does get lots of bjs though) but when we do, it’s amazing and the best sex I’ve ever had! I got him into BDSM about a year ago, which helps with the intensity.

8. You’re going to find outliers here fucking like bunnies, as well as those with dead bedrooms.

   The reality is, yes it does naturally decrease if you don’t work at it. The human biological default is that as you age, you are not a hornball… otherwise 49 year old mothers of newborns would be far more common.

   A lot more couples in their 40s/50s/60s/older **not having sex** than fooling around like horny teens.

   Decreasing hormones play a role, boredom plays a role, each being overweight, not feeling particularly sexy and generally being tired of one another can play a role.

9. Many factors are at play here. Hormonal balance is very important. If that’s off, libido will go down. Becoming distant/not communicating will affect your sex life in a negative way too.

   Sex for us wasn’t as frequent when our kids were babies and toddlers (this is normal) but picks back up for a lot of couples after this time. For us, we’re in our late 30s and having amazing sex frequently. But we make sure to communicate a lot and put in the work for our marriage.

10. I’m 67 and my wife is 57. We only have sex once weekly, but it’s amazing! Weed helps tremendously!

11. We are 45 and our sex life has never been better! Definitely increased with age for us! We are nearly every day and trying new things whilst the younger me would be far more reserved.

12. Hey! Married for 12 years. Sex slowed down a little for us while our kids were babies (mid to late 20s). We are 33 now and we have sex everyday. For me sex changed after having kids too. Prior to kids, we always used condoms or the pull out method. Now, I can’t get enough creampies. It definitely was a game changer 😋

13. Sex increases and gets better with a healthy respectful equitable relationship and one that has good and constant sexual communication. When a couple care about each other, put in the effort and communicate about sex, they hit the sexual jackpot.

14. I would say the quantity gets less but the quality gets better. That was my experience. After 20 years we were married but living in different countries. 2 years later we divorced.

15. May need to change things up. Sex is the same location, same positions can get boring after a while. I’ve been married 19 years and will have sex during the day vs only at night previously. Also on our private back deck, in the suv trunk, etc.

16. It varies a lot between couples.

    Libido isn’t constant through life. Just because she is less interested in sex doesn’t mean that she doesn’t still love you or that she’s losing interest in you. But it might mean that she’s losing at least some interest in sex and doesn’t have the desire for the frequency she once did.

    Reading some stories in subreddits about libido differences, such as r/HLCommunity among others, might be insightful to you.

17. I’m 51 and sex is better than its ever been, and I been been active since age 15. The things you learn about your body, and your partners just makes sex over the top every time. Now other parts of your life are tougher at this age. You gotta resistance train, do cardio, and eat right to be doing the deed at my age to the level and frequency level I hold myself to.

18. I’m 46 and my husband and I have been together 25 years. I’m an attractive woman who gets attention from other men but all I can think about is my husbands big cock in me , or his hand gently sliding down my breasts when we are out- I find him super attractive and when he stands in front of me I want him to hold me and feel his body- keep on top of your hormones and keep talking and teasing each other and exploring to keep things alive

19. 60m 25f was perfect, little issues at the moment due to external issues,but working on being perfect again.

    Frequency was very high

20. Your situation does seem typical, but I don’t think it has to be that way. I (65m) have been married twice, with a good libido match to both women. I was with my first wife from ages 24 to 43, and we had sex about every other day the whole time. I got together with my second (now) wife (68f) at age 45, and we had sex about every third day for the first 10 years, tapering down to about every four days for the last 10 years. It’s not that we want sex any less, our bodies just can’t go quite as often. However, the quality of the sex gets better and better.

    We’ve always prioritized our sex life. We constantly cuddle and grope and kiss throughout the day. We loosely plan our sex, knowing on that third or fourth day it’s gonna happen so we check in on our plans for the day to find the time. If anything it seems like she is even more interested lately, she initiates more often. FWIW, we’re quite vanilla. We haven’t found a need to try every position in the kama sutra or explore every kink, we just love to fuck.

    So that’s been my experience. I’d advise you to talk to your wife about it, in a loving, non pressuring manner. Ask her out of genuine curiosity how she feels about sex and about sex with you. Ask her if she would be interested or at least amenable to putting more focus on your sex life together. Keep it fun and loving.

21. Did she have a hysterectomy or other surgical procedure that affect the ovaries thereby affecting her hormones? All the women I know that couldn’t care less about sex have had those procedures

22. It’s a journey of hills and valleys (or more frequent times and less frequent ones), largely depending on what’s happening in your lives, with your and her health, and what efforts you’re both putting in to staying connected with each other and intimacy.

23. First wife was enough to last 2 lifetimes. She is/was a real nymphomaniac. We divorced when we were both 48 and had 2 rounds the night before court.

    My present wife and I have been together 26 years (I’m 75 this month). For the first 15 years it was 3 to 5 times a week, depending on how much road time I had as a claims adjuster. It slowed down as age set in in our late 60’s and about 2 years ago, she could care less about sex, just give her a good book. Are we happy? Depends on the day… I still work 60+ hours a week on claims from my desk. It takes a toll on me in terms of needing a nap.

    The wood still gets there, that’s why I enjoy this sub so much. Fantasy still works and she’s ok with lending a helping hand every now and again.