Context: One of my friends, “A”, has DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder), and refers to their other identities as “alters”.
When I first met A, it was a sort of “oh they’re cool, I want to be their friend.” And then one day, they were acting differently, and it was just a really sudden “omg they’re so amazing, I want to go out with them” which over the course of a couple hours led to thoughts of kissing, and just being romantically affectionate in general. This feeling disappeared the next time I saw them (a couple days later).
Then the same thing happened a little bit after that. And then it happened again.
A recently opened up to me about how they have DID, and how occasionally one of their alters would be in control, and how alters occasionally act differently. And I realized I’m better than I thought at picking out when those control shifts happened. And today, it finally clicked. A and I were just sitting, watching a video, and I think a shift happened. All of a sudden that feeling of attraction, and the thoughts of romantic affection came back.
It just… clicked. My most logical thought right now is that I don’t have a crush on A, but one of A’s many alters (but I don’t know which one).
How do I move forward with this? Should I move forward with this? Am I just being weird and/or not thinking about this right? Help?
TL;DR: My feelings about my friend who has DID fluctuate, the only logical conclusion I can come to is that I am attracted to one of their alternate identities, but not their main one.
3 comments
Do you want to be monogamous with this one alter, or do you want to keep an open relationship with the whole person?
I would strongly advise seeking therapy or counseling to help navigate these complex emotions and ensure that everyone’s needs are being met.
Oh honey.
Your friend doesn’t have DID. They watched some people faking DID on social media and decided to copy it for attention and/or sympathy. DID is extremely rare. Extremely. It takes a very long time and many medical professionals to diagnose it. Let me guess, your friend is self diagnosed as well. As foe the whole alter thing – it’s bullshit. Again.
Your friend is lying and faking a mental disorder for attention. Let that sink it.
There is 0% chance they have DID.
It always so annoying to see kids faking mental disorders. Give it a few years and you’ll realize how cringy this behavior is.