Me (F-20) and my boyfriend (M-21) have been in relationship for the last 6 and a half months . He is going to have his shoulder surgery coming week . We both are from different clg and we live separately in but nearby . He is having his surgery in the same city as our college and his parents are coming over and are going to stay with him till his recovery. Neither my parents not his parents know about our relationship. Hs mother is already suspicious that i am his girlfriend as his roommate showed my picture to my bf’s mother but she just ignored at that moment .
My bf is insisting me to not come to the hospital when his surgery takes place as he cannot meet me and on top of that his parents will be more suspicious. He’ll only stay for 2 days at the hospital and come back to his flat .
I’m very concerned about him and want to visit him but I’m in a dilemma as i don’t want to make my boyfriend feel pressured because of me . But i also feel that if i don’t go he’ll feel as if i don’t care about him . I asked him if he’ll feel neglected if i don’t come but he said that he’ll not feel anything like that but I’m still not convinced. I told him that I’ll come with his roommates but he’s telling me that his mom will definitely know and he doesn’t have any other female friends with whom I can go .
He has told me that he’ll tell me when i can come and meet him
Pls guys suggest me what should I do in this situation.
TL;DR: I’m confused whether I should visit my boyfriend during his surgery or not in his parents’presence as they do not know anything about our relationship and they are already suspicious about it .
4 comments
Respect your boyfriend’s wishes and wait until he tells you it’s okay to visit him after the surgery. It’s important to respect his privacy and not make things more difficult for him or his family during this time.
Why aren’t you taking him at his word?
Why can’t his parents know you’re dating? Also it sounds like he truly is okay with you not coming, but you’re definitely not. It sounds like you want an excuse to “accidentally” meet his parents and you’re using “I actually think he means this…” as an excuse.
He asked you not to go, and you should respect that. I’m personally not a fan of keeping relationships secret, but if that’s what you’ve agreed to do, this is part of it.