Hey I am a 16 years old boy, It’s not too huge of a problem but here’s my story. I never had a girlfriend in my life or any love life. One day in the future I would love to have a forever girlfriend/wife and possibly start a family but I’m worried it may be hard for me to find a girlfriend/wife one day for those reasons.
*I have mild autism and sometimes I struggle communicating, I am looking for a neurotypical girl though. I also hate when people shout and be angry at me, as that’s the worst thing my brain could handle, I am also introverted but I also hate being lonely.
*I have literally no family but my mother, I don’t have any cousins or siblings in my life and my mother is a single mom who is very introverted and has no social life, I never had birthday parties or even went abroad on holiday yet even at 16, I’m worried a girl/woman wouldn’t want me if I had little to no family in my life. I do have some friends though in school currently but I don’t see them outside of school I certainly want them to become my family too as I never really had that as a younger child, it feels like I missed my child/teen years due to a certain worldwide situation a few years ago.
*I am vegetarian possibly becoming vegan one day in the future, I’ve been vegetarian my whole life because my mother is a vegan. They’re aren’t that many vegan/vegetarian girls out there and alot may not want to be with a vegan/vegetarian, I also have a very limited diets too, basically eating the same things every day.
On the topic of crushes I did have a crush on that one girl in my class back when I was ages 9–13 in my school. I was really obsessed with her I found her really pretty and she actually shares some common interests. She stopped liking me because I was annoying and harassing her and I didn’t know how to respond to a crush at the time. I had a crush on her until I was like 14 or 15, I havent seen her for nearly 4 years but I still kinda miss her and I want to have contact with the girl again and possibly even see her again and maybe I can just be friends with her.
4 comments
Why do you want a girlfriend? Having a girlfriend so she can be your emotional support pet to stop you from being lonely is not a good reason. She will be a human being with her own wants, desires, and goals. She will not exist just to stop you from being lonely and to make you feel loved.
Why must she be neurotypical?
Why is your diet a factor? Do you want to date a vegan for moral reasons?
I don’t want to sound insensitive, but you might need to try and get out into the world a little bit. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Live, scare yourself, get a life outside of your home and your mom. Find your own identity
Why are you looking for a neurotypical girl? I’m autistic and dating other autistics is my high preference. It’s _so much_ easier and much more comfortable. I don’t have to explain myself, I am just understood. We can support each other without giving an instruction manual. It’s fantastic. Autism isn’t going away around neurotypical people, that’s just masking.
I don’t see the family thing being a factor. People date you, not your family.
Also: the majority of vegans are women. Vegan women love vegan men, there is a “shortage” if you will lmao. You can absolutely date as a vegan man and you will be able to date other vegans as well.
I do have to emphasize that finding a girl is not the solution to problems or loneliness. A girlfriend is not going to replace your family. Is not going to replace friends. You’ll need friends still, you can’t expect one person to fulfill all your social and emotional needs and it would be extremely unhealthy. You’ll still have to spend time alone and do things alone. And you’ll still have to love yourself, because a girlfriend isn’t going to make up for lacking feelings of selflove. A relationship isn’t going to make personal problems go away.
Your girlfriend is going to be a person of her own, she is not going to be a magical cure for the things you struggle with. You’re the only person who can fix that. Your relationships are going to be unsatisfying if these are your expectations. And I say that with love and respect. You need to love yourself first.
1. You will not have a girlfriend for the rest of your life. That’s not a bad thing, it show’s that you grow as a person.
2. You need to learn to love people as they want and not as you desire because that is how you show respect and appreciation
3. Only a horrible person would judge you for not having family, you don’t need that in your life
4. You need to find hobbies and friends. Even if you find the perfect girl, you will drive her away because you need her too much. One person can’t and won’t be everything for you.