Men of reddit, what surprised you the most when you got your first girlfriend/started to get to know women?

50 comments

  4. First few girl friends and at the same time some good female friends all opened up to me at the same time about being raped. Bit of an eye opener to say the least.

  5. How fun they can make the small things in life.

    Ever gone out with your girlfriend to get Starbucks? It is such a fun experience. Just watching her making effort to get ready for that small trip, hearing her talk about the most random things as you are walking, and then her ordering for both you and her, customizing the drink in a way you didn’t even know you like it.

    But when you are alone, you most probably won’t even go, and even if you go, you will be like whatever just give me the most basic drink and I am out.

  9. How much they know.
    How passionate they can be about things.
    How they pick up on little things, like moods, small items/details, conversations, etc.
    How delightful they are when they are happy. You can’t not smile. It’s just pure joy watching it.
    How they can hug people and instantly both theirs & her day is just better.

    I have been very fortunate to have a lot of great women go through my life.
    (Surprisingly, including my ex and present wife).

  11. Women say men leave the house with nothing meanwhile my ex’s and my wife will just get in the car with me for the day leaving their ID, keys, and insurance at home like they don’t need any of them ever. Meanwhile they’ll have a purse with every other situation covered but can’t order a drink because they left their ID at home.

  14. They love cuddling. Not only because they’re horny, but they want to suck all of the warmth out of your body to heat up their own artic-level temperature bodies.

    Basically, if you’re literally hot they want to hug you.

  15. That socialization was very wrong about their sex drive. It can wax and wane due to monthly cycles, but when it’s up, it can be very high.

    Edit: fixed wax and wane

  16. The Hair , it’s everywhere in the drain ,in the laundry and sometimes in the food I make. It’s everywhere but you don’t see it until it somehow catches your attention

  18. That they aren’t mythical creatures. You can treat them like normal humans. A lot of women are more crude and disgusting than men.

  21. How far back the vagina is. Before I got intimate with women I just kind of assume it was pretty much near where the penis was, but nope, it’s like, way down there.

  22. Basically I thought all humans put on a veneer of fakeness around some others to an extent.

    I remember thinking “no way this girl is this nice all the time”

    She was… All the time… I left because I felt I wasn’t good enough for her. It felt like I was corrupting her

  23. The biggest thing is some differences in how they see the world vs the way I saw it. There is genuine concerns or fears in some everyday things, that I take for granted and have never given a second thought about.

  28. At some point they develop some sort of calming gentle warmness. I didn’t see it until I was in a real adult relationship but more than one partner just had an effect of almost untangling my brain just by their warm presence.

    Now that I type that I think I just described being loved and the associated stat buff that comes with it.

  29. They’re more obsessed with sex and adventurous with it than our cultural portrayals seem to suggest

    They shed hair like an afghan hound

    Don’t take “everything’s fine” for an answer, be nice – but peel the onion. They hide stuff that turns their heart black sometimes because they’ve been raised to keep the peace. Help them through it and the sky’s the limit

  30. They shower in pure lava. Every single one of them. And they all want to shower with you so you’re either getting melted by being on the water side or frozen by being on the not-watered side.

  31. With my first girlfriend, I found out about the absolutely blood bomb, blood pouring out, left me wondering how the fuck she was still alive. I knew about periods, but jfc.

    My second, I found out different women had different flows, and not every girl was losing gallons of blood every month.

    So I guess I learned about the realities of periods, and not just what you learn in sex-ed

  32. Vagina is really warm.

    Imagine you put your clothes in the dryer and then stand naked in the living room for an hour. Then when the dryer is done you put your warm clothes on.

    That’s what it feels like.

  33. Their insecurities, both the magnitude of them and the subject matter.

    Maybe it’s just because I’m young [22M], but as I get to know a woman, I’m always surprised at how much my perception of her differs from her own (mine is generally far more positive). I’ve even spoken with a *model* who was insecure about her appearance. How? With some women, I wonder whether they’ve ever used a mirror.

    But beyond magnitude is subject matter. Mainly, they think men care about things we generally don’t, and communities like these are flooded with that. And I just have to wonder where they got them from. Maybe they heard a minority opinion from the one man who cared about it? Or maybe they’re insecure about it, so they project? Maybe women just kind of create folk lore about this and pass it down?

  34. How lively, and affectionate they become when you make yourself available to them

  35. just how much stuff they have…like around my sink is like what, 5 things? Soap, deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, brush/comb, maybe 1-2 other small items? They have literally ten times as much shit around their sink and it’s all gigantic bottles and there’s hair and goop everywhere and apparently WE’RE the filthy ones?

  38. How straightforward and reasonable she was.

    I’d heard about/seen a lot of crazy or just unnecessarily complicated stuff happen in relationships. Lots of mixed messages, dishonesty, games, etc.

    It’s why I didn’t have my first girlfriend until 25.

    With my first girlfriend, it was all so simple. The conversation where we went official was something like:

    Me: So, I like you.

    Her: I like you too.

    Me: Yay! And I’m not seeing anyone else, nor am I interested in seeing anyone else.

    Her: Same!

    Me: Would you like to make this an exclusive dating arrangement?

    Her: Very much so, yes!

    It ruined me for less communicative/mature people. I knew that there were women out there that could be reasonable…I lost ALL willingness to deal with unreasonable or overly complicated relationships/people.

    I see them as completely avoidable…so I avoid.

  39. This thread has made me realize I’ve been with the wrong women my entire life. Cheers all you beautiful and wonderful people. I hope your day is a great.

  40. How much of the bed they take up.

    I’ll just sleep in this tiny corner over here 🤣

  41. That even the women you don’t think are wearing makeup are wearing makeup.

    I’d slept over at my first girlfriend’s dorm one day and woke up earlier than usual. I noticed her in the bathroom and went to go give her a hug. She was putting on makeup.

    Maybe it is because some of the women I was friends with really enjoyed more intense makeup or maybe my gf just did it really well and subtly, but until you have a gf or wife, you’re likely to have seen very few women without makeup.

    I had no idea she wore makeup.

  42. If she wants to be there, she’ll figure out a way to be there.

    If she doesn’t, she’ll make up a good excuse to not be there. (most of the time it won’t make sense and it’s just to spare your feelings)

  44. How well prepared they can be for small things that I wouldn’t have put more than 5 seconds of thought into.
    Example: We drove from Colorado to California and ended up on a beach. I brought a towel and she had an umbrella, cooler filled with drinks and snacks, sun screen, some beach games, an extra chair etc etc.
    and I am over here thinking to myself “…. Where did she get the umbrella. I didn’t see her pack it.”

    Bonus : One sink being shared with more than one woman is a disaster

  45. They are so horny. I thought being horny once or twice a week was too much, but my goodness they have some serious drive. Almost every day

  46. My wife leaves her underwear in the bathroom sometimes and vaginal discharge is crazy. It ruins underwear so quickly.

  47. When you go out, just how many people just look/stare at her. The first time we went for a walk in the park, out of the 100 people we passed, I’d say she got 85% of the looks. It surprised me and made me realize that if that happened to me I’d be a lot more self conscious, concerned about my safety, half afraid to venture out alone.

  48. They notice small things.

    I was in a deep conversation with my first girl friend and she told me I am into long hair girls. I didn’t even fucking notice that (it was subconscious). I never sat down and write out a list of all the criteria of what I’m into.

    Heck all the girls I’ve been with just notice all the small stuff.

    Second girl I’ve been with: I went missing for a few hours cause I had to get an implant. Lost my tooth cause of a second root canal on the same tooth. Got implant went on a date with my girl, I smile and we’re just looking at each other. She straight up said I got a new tooth.

    I told my orthodontist and he was surprised and said along the line that she should become an orthodontist.

  49. A few things:

    – The sheer amount of hair they shed
    – The amount of toilet paper they use
    – The amount of bobbypins and hair elastics they can burn through
    – it’s always safe to assume you need to order extra fries/onion rings, even if they say they aren’t hungry.
    – Skincare is way more complicated than I ever thought.

  50. Women have an apt for creating comfortable environments — they know how to turn a house into a home.

    The last woman I dated turned the place she rented into her own vibe within less than a week. Paintings, busts, flowers, candles, music, etc.

    Meanwhile us men leave things bland. I never understood the term “homemaker” until I realised how much women can transform a space into their own.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like