So the title says it all. He told me that I need serious help and that I am a bitch due to my high sexual drive. Was I wrong for being constantly aroused just by looking at him? I never cheated on him or looked at other men while I was with him. Now I masturbate everyday, I watch porn every night (I only watch real couples) to the point that I loose fluids mixed with some blood. I think it’s caused by me fingering myself too much. The point is that I can’t stop. I touch myself when I’m home and I constantly think about sex. Is there something I can do to stop this? I’m afraid that my future boyfriend will react like my ex, knowing that I want to have sex with him everyday for hours.
24 comments
Do what makes you happy. Your bf did you a favor. Find a partner who loves having sex w you as much as you do.
Jesus that dude is a total baby
Don’t worry, if he can’t accept the real you, then you don’t need to be with him, you will find the right person, it’s not your problem
He’s looking down on you and doesn’t want to be a part of the solution but rather part of the problem. Negative judgemental people like him should be out of your life.
Although, what you said made me think that you may need to see someone to address what’s going on with you sexually, bleeding yourself while masturbating and hypersexuality are serious stuff and you must know what’s going on, and again only keep people who are willing to be part of the solution near you
What you can do, is use some lube, or sex toys, so that you can get off without injuring yourself. That’s kind of important. When you find a partner someday, it’ll have to be someone with mostly matching libido.
And if I may indulge myself, the only bitch here is your ex.
I wish I could find a gf with a high sex drive. My last gf made me feel undesired, it was part of the reason I ended things with her.
I think maybe the blood might be a reason to modify your technique a bit? But otherwise….have fun! Many guys will LOVE that side of you.
I was with you until I saw the blood part. If your hobbies and interests causes you harm like that, it’s a problem.
And this is coming from a woman with an extremely high sex drive with a sex/porn blog.
You shouldn’t be hurting yourself like that and to me that’s a red flag and indicates a serious problem. It’s not healthy to do that to yourself.
I see no problem with slutty behavior. I like to be one too. But not when it’s destructive.
If your masturbating is causing physical issues you may want to either change technique or tone it down either in frequency or vigor just so you don’t harm yourself.
Also it’s unclear from your post, you say you touch yourself when you’re at home but does that mean if you’re at home you’re constantly touching yourself? Do you find masturbating and sexual desires get in the way of normal day to day activities? If so then that might also signal a bit of an issue. I only bring that up because it was unclear if it is reaching that level.
I’m all for you expressing yourself sexually and doing as you please so please don’t think I’m telling you to stop. I just thought I should point out that there can be a point where it might be too much but that’s for you to determine based on how it’s impacting the rest of your life. It seems to be impacting things with your bf but he may just not be compatible with your desires.
Sounds like your ex wasn’t very smart….
I have a very high sex drive too…🙄 I communicated this to my bf before we got serious, like I said minimum once a day, otherwise I will masterbate as well…. My libido is strong😂 and he almost a year in is very on board, and I couldn’t imagine being shamed about it…. We even made our own sex video and I will masterbate to that toooo.. it’s so fuckin hot😍 watching him fuck me and finish and squeeze my ass when he’s done is heavenly 🫠🤤 sex is my favorite part of the day hands down😜 you be you!! But get some lube, some dildos you can suction to the wall and ride the shit out of it!!! Life is way to short!!!
I would feel so flattered, turned on, and confident to find out my girl was getting off to pictures of me. What a little baby bitch boy.
However, if your masterbating is causing physical harm or interfering with your daily life, you definitely need to get that under control.
If your masturbation is having a negative/maladaptive impact on your life, it’s time to consider it is hurting you. I would suggest seeing a therapist/counselor to work on your relationship with self-pleasure and possible hypersexuality. Masturbation itself is not unhealthy or wrong, but your relationship with it can be unhealthy or dysfunctional.
You don’t necessarily need to stop this unless you’re actually truly hurting yourself or skipping out on your obligations. As far as relationships, hold out for someone that’s compatible or at least accepting of your high sex drive and isn’t offended if you choose to masturbate more often then they care to have sex. Glad you are no longer with the prude they didn’t see the compliment of your attraction.
I’m probs going to get downvotes to hell. But if this was a guy posting he masterbates all the time and is obbsessed with sex with his partner and watches porn every night many of us have and would be telling him to tone it down and respect the partners boundaries.
I’m all for expressing your sexuality, I’m a very very HL woman. However. You’re bleeding from doing it so much? That is not healthy.
Your bf (ex) should not have called you a bitch. But did u ask before masterbating over photos of him? Do you respect his no when he says no to sex? You constantly thinking about sex is fine, but do you talk about anything else with him? Do you ask him how is day is etc. We need more info before we just judge him because so many guys are told they should be grateful for a partner who wants sex all the time but we don’t all have the same libidos and guys and women can say no whenever they want, without being pestered etc.
My main question is are you OK. Hyper sexuality can be a side effect of trauma, I used to be obbsessed with sex to the point that my partner just couldn’t cope and he just felt like a sex object and not a whole person. I was SA’d a lot, and it made me have this warped view of men and sex. I’ve done a lot of work on me. I say this with genuine concern. Please don’t make yourself bleed.
Sort but your boyfriend was total idiot. You dodged a bullet. Wish you that you gonna find real man.
If there is blood perhaps a trip to the doctor to make sure everything is fine would be good. There is nothing wrong with enjoying it. I personally decided to cut down because I felt it was keeping me from doing more productive things. But it’s a personal choice.
First, that guy was a bunghole. Second, the blood part is indeed worrying. Better consult a doctor and not just reddit.
I think he may not have been what you were looking for unfortunately. Out there is so many different types of people. And sex drives vary sooooo much between them. So does open mindedness for that matter. But out there is a person who is looking for exactly what you are. Just own it, be true to your self and next partner might be a better match. If sex is important to you make sure that the next one know upfront. If they can’t handle it they can move on.
Oh man that sucks! I think what you need is a pal. A confidant who can come over at a moments notice and talk you down…but seriously this sounds like nymphomania which I think is still a thing. Bleeding is always serious as it could lead to infection. Especially if it’s from your nails? Just be careful.
I think lots of men would love to be with a woman with such a sex drive I know I would. But the blood thing sounds like a red flag.
As the old joke says: My girlfriend started smoking what should I do? Maybe slow down a bit and use more lube.
I would only get mad if it was instead of having sex with me.
You are stimulating yourself to the point where you injure yourself regularly and are constantly thinking about sex every day for hours of each day.
That is cause for concern and makes me suspicious that there is more to this you are leaving out. Saying “I can’t stop” is a very serious problem, and I’m guessing that problem is reflected in your actions as well which may be why he said you need help.
Calling you a “bitch” for high sex drive would be wrong (calling you that in general isn’t cool), but I don’t really think reading this that it was just for that. If you want to have sex every single day for hours at a time to the point you are bleeding fingering yourself and still keep going…you do have a problem. And I would wager that problem played a role in how you treated you partner, treatment that seemed normal to you.
I know women having high sex drives is often shamed in society and that is well and truly awful, no person should be made to feel bad for their own desires. However when ANY desire gets to a point where you physically feel you cannot control yourself, takes up hours of your day every day, and those expectations are imparted on the people in your life then you have a problem.
why did not just watch ?
Bleeding during sex or masturbation can also be caused by cervical polyps or cysts. If you’re not doing something that’s genuinely causing harm, and you don’t know why you’re bleeding, I’d definitely get checked out.