Women who chose to be stay at home moms, how is it going? How has your experience been so far?

7 comments

1. I was one, it’s good at first, you revel in the little milestones and accomplishments of your child… Then you lose yourself, like really start to feel like you’re only ‘mum’ and no one else, really feel like shit too, there to wipe arses and take demands from a small dictator all day. Overall I’d say it’s really not good for anyone’s mental health if done for more than a year.

2. I loved it. I was a sahm for 10 years to my daughters. Many don’t enjoy it though and it’s not for everyone

3. So ex sahm current single mom. I loved being a sahm it made me feel like I had a purpose. My kids were doing better in school and socially. When I went back to work, things took a downhill turn, my relationship was already in a bad place, and leaving was the best thing I could have done but me not being around to help my children through that difficult time made it so much worse.

4. Sahm for 4 years, 2 kids ( 4yo and 2yo).
   It definitely is hard, you’re never off the clock your breaks are always around your kids, the mental load is huge even if you have an amazing partner.

   But i love it, i love watching my kids grow and become greag people, i genuinely enjoy spending time with them, going for walks, doing activities, crafts, etc etc

   I wouldn’t change it for the world

5. I’m going through a divorce and that 10 year gap on my resume is living hell.

6. I’ve been one for the past year and I’m headed back to work next month. It’s not for me. I feel like my brain has turned to mush and my identity has been reduced to just wife and mother. I enjoy the flexibility it provides and the memories I’ve gotten to make with my daughter, but I desperately need more variety and adult interaction in my life (and playgroups and mom meetups don’t scratch that itch for me). I’m going back part time so I’m hoping that will be the sweet spot.

7. SAHM here going into my 11th year. Hubby opened his biz when our first was born & so I never had a choice (he’s a tradie & I was a registered nurse). He worked around 90 hours a week up until our 3rd bub was 12 months old when I had a near-mental breakdown. He stopped working weekends & he now does 3-4am til 6pm Mon-Fri. I do have family around but not supportive so I really have felt like a single mother raising our kids. I’m glad that I’ve been their primary carer & never had to worry about daycare etc. The kids are very close to me & my boys (3 boys 1 girl) are extremely loving & affectionate. My girl is gorgeous too. I wanted to stop at 2 kids but hubby wanted 4
   They’re my whole world & I love them to bits. It’s been extremely hard though & the little issues of poor health & complicated pregnancies along with special needs in one child has honestly been a challenge that at times, has taken my mental health to some extremely dark places. I’ve been suffering from burnout for years & somehow I get through it. The road is lonely long & hard but rewarding in other ways.
   I wished so badly that I had supportive family & grandparents but I didn’t/don’t & that’s something I got used to very quickly & knew I’d be doing this alone.
   As for work, I’m now feeling like a lost, undervalued, skill-less loser to be honest. I’ve lost my nurses rego & now as a 39 yo my occupational outlook is looking bleak to be honest. I’m now trying to thinking of what options I have or ways to retrain & do something that’s going to make me feel good about myself.
   But my hands are tied still as 3 older 3 are in primary school & my youngest goes to preschool 3 days a week. During the week, it’s just me for everything so there’s no option of anyone else doing a drop off or pickup. Our youngest is off to school next year but I’m still limited to 5 hours between school drop off & pickup. Weekends could be an option but we are both now going in different directions with all of the weekend sport.