Probably im a bit depressed but i don’t wanna lose friends bc of this

20 comments

  2. It’s okay to be a slow texter.

    If they’re your friends then you can let them know that your intention is not to ghost them.
    And explain why you’re unable to reply promptly.

  3. I tell my friends. The ones who wanted to stick around did the ones who didn’t – didn’t. I also send them reassuring messages every now and then to remind them of my love for them:) I know it’s hard to be caught in the cycle of procrastination. But we will be better:)

  4. It’s unreasonable to expect someone to respond to a text immediately, unless you and another/others are planning something that’s going to happen in the next few hours. I feel that consistently expecting a text shows that someone has poor boundary issues. I try to keep this in mind for myself, and honestly I go out of my way to wait a bit if it’s not a pressing issue. I think if you consistently reply rapidly to texts, it can make certain people expect this. I wait in increments because it’s helped me weed out new people who I thought would be friends but flip out because I don’t respond to them immediately.

    Anyway, respond on your own time. If someone legitimately wants to be your friend, they will wait. If they press you, steer clear.

  5. I set my standard reply within 2wks. If someone can’t reply my boundaries to protect my mental health they can Gtfo of my life. And yea so far everyone (cept two bullets dodged) were like ” OMG DUDE I TOTALLY GET IT, Do your thing!” It’s been a great way to filter out people that feel entitled to my time/energy. I give to them if & when I want to, not out of obligation+ encourage them to the same. It’s a healthier way to live.

  6. Tell your friends what u told is early on freindship. So, they can understand and it doesn’t look like making excuses.

  7. I don’t even have the excuse of being a slow texter, sometimes I’m just tired as hell after a day of writing emails, the last thing I want to do is basically write more emails but in a social capacity after work. Sometimes I just cannot be fucked at all. Real ones will not leave you because of this.

  8. Just be upfront with them and say “hey, it takes a lot of effort for me to think up a reply, so I would appreciate some patience, please.” Or something of that nature. If they can’t deal with it, they’re not worth your time.

  9. I text kind of fast cuz I use my Google to listen to my voice and I just talk to my phone and it types it out. I’m kind of big money. My my fingers are so big. That one finger covers four by buttons. That’s why I use this. Only thing you got to be pay attention sometime Google have to tendency and putting words that you didn’t say no one that happens. I just usually say oh Google don’t strike today or he must be on break. So don’t overthink it. Have yourself a fabulous day

  10. I would tell people that so they know what to expect. I’m the same way. I’ve had people get so upset because I responded a day or 2 later. Sometimes I’m just busy and other times I am just not in the mood to respond. People shouldn’t expect a response asap but we live in a society where people feel entitled to a fast response and it shouldn’t be that way.

  11. Tell people that up front. If you don’t, they’ll think you’re upset about something or don’t want to continue the relationship. They aren’t mind readers. If someone did that to me without telling me why, I would also probably stop being their friend after a while. Friendships are 2 way streets. You need to put in some effort.

  12. Is this a yongun thing?

    In my mind text, like e-mail or letters, are a thing which doesn’t require a fast response. If you want a fast responce – call.

    Fun fact, my dad never responds to text messages.

    I just text when something comes up in order not to forget about it. They can answer whenever they have time.

  14. One of my best friends is like that too, so if I really want to talk to her, we mostly make phone calls or meet in person.
    Aside from that I’ve learned to be more patient and wait for her reply over time, when I realized she was a good friend who cares about me and values my presence.

    If I hadn’t seen her physically that often (same school, we used to hang out almost daily) I would have thought she’s ghosting me though.

    I guess I’m just trying to say that there are so many ways to show people that you appreciate them and want them in your life that have nothing to do with texting and might in return make it easier for people to accept the fact you’re a slow texter because they know at that point that it’s not due to a lack of care or interest

  15. Try typing on omegle with strangers and become spontaneos it doesn’t have to be well thouhht dialogue, say stupid things but be true to yourself, after a while you’ll see things come naturaly.

  17. Ehh texting isn’t for everyone, for me I only text to make plans, unless someone is my closest friend, but still I’m grown, no one has time to text someone all day lol

    I prefer phone calls cause I don’t have to stop what I’m doing to talk on the phone

  19. You are probably insecure about your answers, remember you can just send them a short answer insted of thinking of the perfect answer. or just a sticker or an emoji. In WA i sometimes just react to their answers. And i tend to forget to answer people and days later answer them and if necessary i apologise for not replying sooner. usually no one gets bothered by it.

    Soon you will learn to just answer the first thing you think, but on the meantime don’t be too harsh on yourself, what’s important is that you are trying.

  20. Depression is doing a heavier number on you than your texting habits.

    I’m much the same. Spent years without a phone, then glued to the damned thing. At this point, unless I am expecting a call or communique, phones on silent and no buzz. I value my friends and contacts, but have learned the value of myself and my freedom and have learned to put that at the front.

    The folks I stay in touch with get it. You’ll find a tribe that does, too.

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