I have been reconnecting with a girl recently. I have always been a little attracted to this girl and even more now that we have reconnected. We are friends up to this point. We have hung out twice by going surfing together. By the middle of the second “hang out”, I knew that I wanted to make my feelings known and pursue her. I get a lot of mixed signals from her and it’s not easy since we are just hanging out and enjoying each others company while trying to not die while surfing. I initiated a lot of physical touch and didn’t get a solid positive or negative reaction. She just didn’t really respond and I didn’t have a lot of confidence because of that. She seems to really enjoy my company and goes out of her way to hang out with me. It’s a great time being around her. I wanted to kiss her but she didn’t really give me any signs or opportunities. I ended up not kissing her and I am really beating myself up for it as it seems that my chances to make my feelings known are up. The moment didn’t feel right. Is there a way to make my feelings more clear ? Or did I just fuck it up by not taking the chance to kiss her ?
6 comments
Ask her out on an actually date and you’ll have your answer. If you go on a date and hit it off what I usually do is walk them to their car and make some eye contact once we are there to get the vibes and lean in for the kiss.
It depends on the person. In some cases I’ve lost interest, in other cases my interest has intensified.
In this case it does sound like she may be interested in you, and it’s definitely not too late. Ask her out and see what happens. Good luck!
U initiated physical touch, and it wasn’t reciprocated, there’s your answer
you didn’t “mess up”. there is no correct way to conduct yourself, as long as you are doing so in a way that is true to yourself and respectful of other people.
The “pace” of intimacy (in all forms) is deeply personal and it’s entirely guided by what you are mutually comfortable with. Why would your chance to make your feelings known have passed? You know what’s an even easier way to make those known? Tell her. Communicate!
If she likes you, talking about it is not going to scare her away, and if she doesn’t, then there you go, situation is cleared up.
ask her out.
It’s hard to know everyone’s personal pace. Ask if she wants to do something clearly romantic like