My bf (m23) and I (f23) were at a grocery store, and some idiot stole my parking spot that I was waiting for, I wasn’t about to get in a fender bender and let that ruin my day so I quickly moved on to find another spot. My boyfriend gets super frustrated and angry at that kind of stuff, like on my opinion way too unnecessarily angry. He gets quiet and won’t talk to me. Then whips his phone out and starts angrily typing. I ask him if he’s talking about that situation to his friend. He said no he’s not they’re talking about something else. This friend he has is extremely misogynistic and isn’t a fan of me already and I just had a feeling he was talking about me to him. I said okay fine then show me. My bf got all quiet and was laughing almost. That to me gave me the answer I needed. He did show me and he said to his friend “man why are women such unassertive drivers” and explained to his friend that I just let this person steal my spot, his friend replied and said that women are just way too emotional and sensitive and that I probably would have even felt bad. I literally didn’t know what to do with this but be really taken aback and also laugh because my bf got himself all worked up that someone was a dick and took my spot, and I’M the emotional and sensitive one. I’m extremely conflicted by this and I don’t know what to think. I absolutely hate that he will go to his friend that he knows doesn’t like me and has just awful takes on everything, and low key talk shit about me and group me in with “women drivers”, I’m so confused and annoyed. He apologized for not respecting me and we ended up just leaving the topic. I’ve since left his apartment and just not sure what to think.

49 comments

  1. He’s misogynistic. You have a misogynistic boyfriend. He has misogynistic opinions and other misogynistic friends.

    I, personally, would break up without hesitation.

  3. So, this was the second time that we’re aware your BF has talked shit about you behind your back. This previous [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/11s1e6g/i_f23_looked_at_my_bfs_m23_phone_and_he_was/) is still reflecting his character today.

    Also, keep in mind, these are just conversations that you happened to catch… I am willing to bet that there many more that you’re unware of.

    I don’t know about you, but if my GF found out that I was talking shit about her… I would be single within the hour.

    Sounds like its time to leave the trash at the curb and find a boyfriend who boasts about you to their friends, instead of one who shits on you.

  4. So. You’re dating an asshole who doesn’t respect you and apparently doesn’t even like you.

    “What to think” is how fast you should dump him, it seems to me …

  5. > This friend he has is extremely misogynistic

    I have bad news for you: your boyfriend is also misogynistic, which is why they’re friends.

  6. That’s some redpill bullshit right there. He’s pissed at you for what, not flipping out when someone cuts you off? It’s like he’s looking for an excuse to put you down and judge you.

  7. Well….how many times is he going to talk shit about you before you realize this is his character? You were upset about this same issue a month in a half ago. I bet this has been an ongoing theme in your relationship. You a dating a man who demeans you and makes you look like a clown, on a regular basis to his friend. If I were you I would set my bar for higher standards in a boyfriend than what you have now.

  8. if someone is friends with an “extremely misogynistic person” and acts like a misogynist with that person, guess what, they are a misogynist! Why do you want to be in a relationship with this type of person. Someone that actually respected you would not be doing this shit. You handled the parking situation like an adult with control over their emotions

  9. While you’re at it, text him it’s over.

    I remember seeing a comment about how “guys say women are emotional, but tell a man no and see what happens” lmao it’s crazy out here babes. Be safe ❤️

  10. Why should he respect you if you don’t respect yourself? Why are you in this relationship?

  11. he’s a misogynist, what else is there to say? he don’t like women as people and it sounds like he has a lot of contempt for you in particular. that’s not how you deserve to be loved

  13. Dump him. He’s on a journey to misogyny and it’s probably going to get worse.

  14. Empirical evidence suggests women are better drivers, insurance companies are in favor of women drivers. Your bf is POS

  15. If they hate women that much, I’m sure they’d make a wonderful couple. They don’t deserve to have women just do disrespect them. I hope you find a better man.

  17. Funny it’s women who are overly emotional but yet you wrote that your BF gets extremely angry when situations like that happen… Hmm. Has he not seen or heard about people getting shot for less? Road rage is real and people are killed, but your the overly emotional one….
    With friends like that, I don’t see why he even wants a girlfriend.

  18. He’s extremely immature. What did he want you to do—end up in some road rage incident? Some loon might have a weapon. People end up dead over crap like this.

    And your worthless boyfriend has to text his bro about it because both of their lame asses are intimidated by women.

    Find a man and let those boys have their He-Man Women Haters Club.

  19. I love how they (misogynists) like to claim we’re so emotional and sensitive but they flip out at the slightest thing. Umm dude, your emotion is leaking out all over the place. You boyfriend is a misogynist, sorry. I’m sorry you’ve wasted time with him but how many more days are you going to waste?

  20. So hes abusive and him and his bff are sexist assholes.

    Dump him and block him

  23. What does he want you to do? Lose your mind and rage at the driver?? You were very mature for just moving on–you have to prioritize your peace. And your bf talking shit about you to his friend? It’s wrong and it shows he lacks loyalty. And the fact that he’s giving you the silent treatment? That’s abuse and shows his inability to properly communicate.

    I hope I’m not over stepping but I feel like he’s done this before–behaved this way towards you. There are so many red flags. Remember: prioritize your peace. Here you have an immature guy that can’t communicate and lacks loyalty. You don’t need someone like that in your life. There are plenty of guys in the world that can treat you better.

  26. Ugh! Who has time for misogynists?

    Go over there when he’s not home or is about to have to leave for a bit, grab all your stuff, leave the key on the counter and lock the door on your way out!

    Then block him on EVERYTHING and be done with it. You don’t need to say a word; he wouldn’t actually listen anyway.

    Consider the whole thing a lesson learned and a bullet dodged! Can you imagine putting up with his disregard and hate for the rest of your life? While you were pregnant? While you were chasing after small children? For decades???

    Just drop him and ghost him!

  27. ~~my boyfriend’s friend~~ my boyfriend is very misogynistic.

    There, fixed it for you.

    You seem to give a pass to your boyfriend for doing exactly the same things his friend does, and cheering each other, and piling on… On top of that, by your own account your boyfriend has no control over his feelings and escalates minor situations. I guess he wouldn’t have been happy unless you got aggressive with a random driver? Would placing yourself in danger for a stupid reason be the way to please him? Seriously, your boyfriend talks shit about you when you decide not to be stupid. Why are you dating this man???

  29. Lmao they must have balls of steel to call YOU the overemotional one. What clowns. Do they not know that anger is an emotion?

  31. Number 1 is that if he’s friends with a misogynist, he’s also a misogynist. Number 2 is do you really want to be dating someone who’s gonna keep complaining behind your back about every little thing? Knowing his friend is going to say even worse things about you? You want a partner who defends you, not one who invites his friends to shit talk you

  32. Yeah you deserve better, this sounds like a minor thing in comparison to some other things, but it shows his true colors exponentially and he’s probably done stuff like this before and still will, and it will probably progress to be worse every time. I hope you leave him

  34. Run, he’s a jerk, I’ve been with some jerks in my life, but this one is ridiculous 🙄

  36. “When people show you who they are, believe them.”

    Your bf doesn’t respect you, and frankly it sounds like he doesn’t respect women in general. At the very least, this is the path he will continue walking down if he keeps other guys like this “friend” in his life. 20yo me would have stuck around and tried to get him to understand how harmful this behavior is. 30yo me knows life is too short and would end it relatively quickly, especially if this isn’t a one-off.

  37. If you had either hit this other car with yours OR got really mad and yelled at thenother driver, flipped him off, started a fight, etc.

    I bet he would have had the exact same things to say. “Why are women such emotional drivers? She couldn’t keep her cool. She’s probably PMSing!” ( eye roll)

    Is it even about driving at all?? Or is it that he’s gonna use any excuse to berate you and then talk shit about you to help solidify him and his buddy’s views?
    Get your stuff from his place and write this one off as a loss. Don’t let him be a dick and your day. Quickly move on.

  38. >This friend he has is extremely misogynistic and isn’t a fan of me already

    Both of these things apply to your boyfriend, unfortunately.

    He’s also misogynistic and isn’t a fan of you. Someone you actually likes you doesn’t message insulting things about you to their friends.

    You can and should do better.

  39. Girl, your boyfriend is just as misogynistic as his friend.

    Don’t date someone who doesn’t like or respect you.

    Also – men who have misogynistic friends *are misogynists*. There isn’t grey area here. Men who actually respect and like women do not have friends who hate women.

  41. Your boyfriend is very immature. He wants to get all bent out of shape about a parking spot, and needs validation from a misogynist about his anger…

  43. No offense, but… why do y’all people date people like this? Genuinely asking. What is attractive about someone that is misogynistic, mean, and miserable like this? I genuinely do not understand.

  44. Be careful around cops op, I’m pretty sure you’re actually dating 3 kids in a trench coat because 23 is way too old to be thinking like that. Does his ID say mclovin?

  45. Sounds like you bf and his friend and way too immature for you, my advice is to move on

  47. Your boyfriend is also extremely misogynistic. Not to mention a liar and extremely immature.

  48. You know how people talk about “red flags”? Or how people in really toxic relationships start to realize there were early signs? Yeah, this is that.

  49. He is courting his friend … imagine if his guy friend was a female and he was texting her about you like this.
    Does that make it more or less acceptable. To me neither. You need to drop the boy, your obviously a woman and he’s just a boy. Contradicting his own words / behaviors then. Trying to trash talk you with his buddy IN YOUR PRESENCE!!!! Fuck that. I’d be out. Whatever you decide I wish you luck and promote & appreciate patience, communication & good manners.

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