I’m not sure what to do, I’m trying to be supportive and help her but I don’t think she’ll take any action and it’ll just get worse. This man has been emotionally abusing her for years he does blow regularly and is an alcoholic.
They have three kids together and she essentially does all of the parenting and only works a small part time job.
She called me today and told me he held her down on the bed and slapped her. He’s gotten close many times but followed through this time. Any advice? How do I help?
3 comments
Offer her support. You can’t force her to leave. You can offer her maybe a place to stay? Her and the kids. Let her know you love her and will always be there for her, however she needs, but there’s nothing you can do as you can’t force her to leave, especially since kids are involved and abuse. Abuse is such a complicated, sensitive minefield to navigate.
The kids shouldn’t be anywhere near this. They’ve probably witnessed the emotional abuse, at least. Has the father ever gotten violent or physical with the kids? Do you fear for the children?
The father drinks and does drugs and physically assaulted their mother. If your sister refuses to leave, but you genuinely think the children are in any danger, you need to intervene. It’ll devastate your sister but the kids need to come first.
We live in 2023 sadly. The time of the tree hugger. So what’s said above is good advice.
But for me, as a brother, a husband hits my sister and the rules change. My family have a pretty decent history and with it a name (we are from a gypsy background). And when my sister was hit by her husband she smashed the house up fighting him. When the police arrived they arrested him, why? Because they actually told him that he was safer in the police cell than being left out. This was true. When he was released he paid for what he did and that was that. Both my uncle and my father sat outside the court house waiting for him to come out. He never went near my sister again.
Make him deeply regret this. Leave a memory.