Hello, I(23M) am asking for advise about what to do in a situation with my friends and their girlfriends. So for some context, my friend Jake(23M) was dating a girl Kylie(23F)(fake names) until they went on break about two months ago. They are taking some time apart but they are still exclusive to each other. Kylie has a roommate named Emily(23F)that I am very good friends with. Me and my girlfriend willow(23F) went to a party at their place the other day. While there, Emily told me about how Kylie was cheating on Jake. Later, willow heard Kylie and Emily talking about it in the bathroom. Emily is getting married in 2 months and Kylie is a bridesmaid and is a Roommate until after the wedding. Emily told me that she doesn’t want Kylie to find out that it was her that snitched about the cheating but I wanted to tell Jake. I decided to call Jake and tell him about it. I stupidly said that it was because of what willow heard in the bathroom and didn’t mention Emily at all. Jake didn’t believe me and called Emily to ask if she saw anything. Emily backed down and said that she never saw anything and that she didn’t know anything about this. Now, Kylie is manipulating Jake to believing that I’m making this whole thing up for attention or something. All of these people have been close friends for years and I don’t know what to do from here. Jake is furious with me and says we need to talk tomorrow once he calms down. If I tell him the whole truth then I throw Emily under the bus and he may not even believe me. I don’t know what to do.
TL; DR
I told my friend about his girlfriend cheating on him based on what someone else told me and now he doesn’t believe me.
2 comments
Stick to your guns man. If you waver, you will lose a friend. It would be better with evidence of some type.
This is my advice, don’t throw anybody under the bus, YET. Just say that you have no reason to lie to him and remember not to tell him you heard this from a source, because if he tells that to his girlfriend, she might have a guess who it is, and then you might lose your source of info for good, and if he choose to believe you or not, that is his choice. Give him an advice or 2 about keeping his eyes on his gf, emphasize on 2 things, first, if something happen in the future, make sure he remember you warned him, and he fell down this hole because he broke the code “Bros before h….”. Second, if he wants to end your long-term friendship because he trust his gf so much, so be it, but if he doesn’t want to end it, then stay to help him. How? You talk to the source yourself, maybe bring your gf with you to talk to her, say that what if Emily find out her friends knew her husband is cheating on her, but chose not to tell her. What would she feel? a dagger in the back is not enough? but 2 daggers in the back at the same time? That can drive any man or woman insane. And if Kylie is cheating on Jake, it means she is the type of woman who can fool around with any man, Emily wants to keep that kind of girl near her husband? It’s like keeping a poisonous snake in your own sleeve and hope it won’t bite you.