I have had a friend for a while and I am interested in her. I asked her out once but the answer was that she didn’t want to get involved with anyone and just wanted to be friends. However, after that, she seemed to get closer, talk more and have more physical contact with me.
I am confused and don’t know if it is just her way or if something has changed. I’ve been thinking about asking her if there is any chance for us to date and, if not, tell her that I still value our friendship, but this could make the situation worse.
Should I ask her if there is a chance? I would really like our relationship to evolve and I am willing to talk about this with her, what would be the best way to ask?
2 comments
Take what she said seriously.
I would go with an indirect approach. Ask her to please chill with the physical contact and closeness as it makes you develop feelings and you want to respect her statement that she only wants friendship.
This shows you respect her and her choices. It will also have the effect of her reflecting on her own behavior and what she wants.
Your friendship will either be saved or she’s will say she actually thinks she wants more.
I was in a similar situation with an aromantic girl who’s my best friend. I suggest asking her if she’s aromatic so you can (hopefully) not feel the need to ask her out if she is. After I learned that my friend was aromantic, I never felt the need to ask her out again and felt content. However, if she says that she’s not, then you should be honest with her.