I’m a man over 30 (38) who has had a roughly 15 year (within a few months) break since my last relationship. (edited to add; this includes dating. I’ve had 0 dates in the past 15 years)
I’m curious of the experiences of any man who has had similar happen to them. Did you later find a relationship? How did the partner react to the massive gap? Did you decide you were better off alone and find happiness that way? etc etc.
3 comments
Well the good thing is it’s not like a job interview – having a gap like that requires zero explanation 🙂 If someone asks, just say you’ve dated but haven’t found the right person yet. Easy!
My four year relationship just went up in a brutal light show of flames recently and I’m taking a bit of a break from dating. Naturally, as soon as I decided that I somehow became an object of interest to the opposite sex lol
I think the best thing to do is just explore, experiment, don’t put pressure on yourself. It’s weird and counterintuitive, but I think the harder you try to find a mate, the less likely you are to find one.
Enjoy yourself! Get out there! Touch some bums (consensually, of course)
Why do you think you haven’t ever dated anyone? That’s probably more important that what may or may not happen if you tell your partner that.
I’ve taken a break of a couple years before. Never felt the need to explain myself or really even mention it once I started dating again. But I do remember the first chick I slept with after that break said something afterwards about how she hadn’t had sex in a while and I was like oh yeah how long? She said about 3 months and I laughed and said yeah I’ve been in a bit of a dry spell myself. She said somehow I doubt that so I decided to just let it go.
Not quite that long, but more recently, I haven’t dated since before Covid. And honestly, I had a good gig being single, life was stable, fun, and I enjoyed my alone time.
I recently jumped back into the dating pool after being introduced to someone I went to high school with, We’re both 42, graduated in 1999. Anyways, it was nice connecting with someone for a while.
But then the problems started, she had a lot of baggage from her past relationships, I had some too, but hers was still affecting her. She had trust issues, got mad if I didn’t text her in a certain time frame, got mad I couldn’t hang out with her more often (I work 6 days a week plus class, she only worked 3, no classes) and we had good times, but we argued a LOT, we just had different personalities.
Needless to say, I actually broke up with her, a rarity for guys I know. But Idk if dating today is just supposed to be that much work, but I just found myself wanting to go back to my solo life.
Sorry for the rant, just giving you an example. I think it’s fun to date with long gaps, because you are used to being single, that way, if you meet someone you dig, you’ll be happy, but if you meet someone that you don’t click with, or they reject you, oh well, because you know how to live happily single.