How soon is too soon to move in with a new GF?

19 comments

1. After an hour.

2. I moved in with my wife after about a month of dating. Worked for us!

3. Depends on your age and where you’re at in life.

   Generally I’d say under a year, but big difference between just having to pack a bag and carry it into your girlfriend’s apartment in college versus two adults where one of you would have to sell or rent out their house to move in together.

4. 6 months

5. If you’re in California, never (Palimony is a thing there, so cohabitation can result in you getting screwed). Anywhere else, about 6 months (if not a year) to get the new relationship high out of your system.

6. Depends on the rental contract and if you can afford the place in case you break up. But generally I feel like if you’re gonna have a roommate, might as be with the person you’re likely to be spending nights with anyway…

7. I’d say don’t move in. Sleep over from time to time is one thing but live-with? Watch out for cohabitation laws in your area.

8. I think 6-12 months is the sweet spot. Established enough to know that you see a future, so you move on to the next step. The step that follows that would be getting engaged (assuming marriage is your goal).

9. I moved in after about 4 weeks. Married with a 5 and a 3 year old.

   You can either live with someone or you can’t, dating doesn’t really show that. Turned out I’d found someone I couldn’t live without.

10. If you havent gotten to know her for at least 2 years and arent getting married soon. For the 1st, you dont know her (you just think you do), and the 2nd, it changes the entire relationship dynamic. There are benefits to moving in together, but if the only ones that make a meaningful impact are finances, steady access to sex, or some type of care from her then you arent in a good position in life yet. You should be able to take care of everything important without a need for her/anyone impacting your quality of life beyond having a desirable relationship with her/anyone.

11. Can you live without her? Anything less than no it’s too early

12. Whenever you’re ready.

13. Don’t do it. When you live with a woman, all the mystery and suspense is gone. Instead, plan one or two nights a week where you stay together. On that night the entire night is devoted to food and sex and being together. She gets your full, undivided attention for 12 hours. Then she gets to remember that and look forward to the next time.

14. I love how this question offers absolutely no context or additional information, but expects a meaningful answer.

    The short answer is to use your best judgement. If you need someone else’s opinion to answer this question, then you are not ready.

15. Time frame can vary but having the important conversations needs to happen prior to moving in.

    1. Do you want kids?
    2. What kind of future do you envision?
    3. How do you handle stress? How do you wanted to be treated when you’re stressed?
    4. What type of alone time do you need?
    5. Which side of the bed do you sleep on?

    There are probably more but these are the ones that popped into my head. Rushing into moving in prior to being on the same page about the big things will likely be disastrous.

    If you want hard numbers, I wouldn’t even consider moving in together prior to 6 months of an exclusive relationship, but more than likely closer to a year to actually move in if that’s where we were headed.

16. Before you even fuck her.

17. I’d say somewhere between 1-2 years from the start of the relationship. During this time, you are getting to know each other.

18. 2 years or less.

19. I did everything wrong (divorced in February, started dating her in March, became a couple in April, met her/my kids in May, moved in together in October) and we’ve been together for 9 years