For me I love hearing about it and all the details while we are going at it. She loves it too. But after we are done I feel so guilty and ashamed. Any way/ tips to dealing with that?

5 comments

  2. Best advice from me is to learn to just embrace what you like and what she likes. The past is the past, and she’s with you now. The important thing is to understand that it bring you guys closer together in the moment.

    But this is definitely just my opinion

  3. I feel like you need to unpack that a bit. What exactly are you feeling guilty/ashamed over? Do you think you’re disrespecting her somehow? Do you feel weird because you’re “supposed” to find her past sex life upsetting? Do you want it to go farther and actually see her with another dude?

  4. Just be patient with yourself. First off, the “shame” that you’re feeling is probably part of the fun when you’re in the moment–it’s taboo to enjoy the thought of our partners with others. That’s likely part of the fun for you both. (It is for us anyway.) Just recognize that the shame you’re feeling afterward is just a feeling, just an outgrowth of what we’ve (mis-)learned about sexuality (that it’s supposed be possessive). Don’t beat yourself up for feeling it, but also recognize that it’s unnecessary.

  5. In what regard, evey detail or just the senarios? I to find it a turn on in most cases but dependant on the other person involved I’d imagine?

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