Men: How would you react if you found out your GF has a work husband who shes emotional about?

45 comments

  4. I’d tell her she has to knock it off.

    And if she doesn’t in a reasonable amount of time, leave her.

  7. I’d immediately let her go since she doesn’t take me seriously enough to convey that to me in the relationship. Because it’s no different from having a sneaky link in my opinion.

  9. Situational. Leave if you don’t fuck with it or stay with her because you don’t mind. If it upsets you, try to mend the relationship and express your boundaries.

  11. This is a red flag. It’s not worth the hassle. I’d move on.

  12. Define “emotional”. Like, “friend”? Or “would absolutely fuck if didn’t think it would blow her life up”?

  13. My ex wife had an affair with her work husband… so yeah. I would view it as a precursor to full blown affair

  16. > work husband

    > emotional

    This is a big red flag. I don’t think the idea of a work spouse is inherently bad, but there HAS to be boundaries.

  17. Hey man, first, that really sucks thats happening. In my books I’d consider that emotional cheating. There is a difference between friends and going beyond that. Just having a work friend who cares about you is one thing, but giving it a label like work husband shows a level of intimacy that I would not be comfortable with my girlfriend having with another guy.

    Work friends are fine. Work friends you care about are fine. We are human after all and care about each other. But going beyond that….thats a red flag.

  18. Emotional cheating is still cheating. Personally, I would express my discomfort, but there’d be no true way of knowing besides assuming things based on her change in body language and picked up habits. Ive been cheated on, and the one thing Ive noticed it’s thay they stop mimicking things I do and mimick the other party. I wont say it’s that wa in *every* case, nor am I saying that only women do the mimicking. Just my personal experience.

  19. I have a work wife that’s completely harmless, I’m 30 she’s 50 and married. Other colleagues call her my work wife because she asks me to help her all the time, how to do something on the computers, help move something build something etc. it’s not a flirty relationship, it’s purely work and colleagues having a joke with us.

  20. She’s cheating, best case scenario is that the cheating is only emotional

  21. emotional cheating is a real thing and it is a huge red flag, my ex did this with her best gay friend she worked with, always taking about how handsome he was, I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, I see it now but if this is happening to you just realize it is a huge red flag

  22. My ex wife had something like that, when I expressed concern about said “term” or “relationship”, she said “it’s just at work, nothing to worry about”.

    The rest is history and I’m glad she’s my ex

  23. I’d be pissed, and completely question the relationship. It’s situational, but I can’t think of many situations where this arises out of the blue and it’s okay.

    It’s okay to have friends of the opposite sex, but it is also important to communicate this with your partner. No communication breeds way for distrust, and adding emotion to that is a powder keg. Unless there was a very solid answer for this, or an odd scenario where it’s acceptable like a previous arrangement in the relationship, I’d probably walk.

  24. I’d be concerned that this weird American culture is infecting my life. Next she’ll be saying the dog is a fUr BaBy and shit like that.

  25. My former boss used to call me her work husband. And that definitely included flirting with me and being affectionate towards me. This usually occurred when her home husband was being particularly douchey. Which he was frequently. While I was annoyed to have her emotional baggage dumped on me at times, I admit that I didn’t keep my distance… because the ass was too juicy. The temptation was real. I did, however, realize that she was completely using me to get the attention and support she wasn’t getting at home. And that I would never receive anything in return.

  26. I’ve always thought it’s disrespectful to the significant other to call anyone else a “wife” or “husband”. No one else should be able to have that title and I have always felt emotional cheating is the worst kind of cheating. That’s just my personal feelings though.

    Hope you find the clarity you’re looking for!

  27. Add former before GF and we’re good. Big conspicuous bright red flag. Get out now

  28. Id get her suitcase ready. Emotional cheating to me is worst. I can understand wanting to have sex with someone but getting into an emotional attachment takes work, dedication, and more importantly time. In order to develop such attachment means someone has put time and effort into it.

  30. Wouldn’t waste my time, cut all ties with him or she’s getting released to the streets where she belongs.

  32. Work husband or work wife is weird af and I’m not sure why people are trying to normalize it and make it seem like it’s harmless

  34. Emotional affairs happen before physical. She sounds like a fucking cheater to me.

  36. I worked in a doctors office where I was the only male (excluding doctors) I had many work wives. Not a big deal.

  37. I’d talk to her about it, find out how serious it is, what the nature of their friendship is like. And see if there’s anything I could be doing to get her to feel more secure in being able to open up to me about anything and everything. Is it that I’m not providing a safe space for her to confidently express herself to me so she has to find an outlet elsewhere? So I’d probably work with her on our communication with each other.

    But, if it’s truly just friendship with someone she shares long hours with, then I’d probably be okay with it as long as the boundaries are respected. I’d probably like to eventually meet them, to put a face to a name, and get to know them. Maybe they’re good people and I can never have a shortage of good people around in life.

  38. Outside looking in I see this at different jobs. It always leads to whispers and rumors that make it awkward. I’m probably the most anti social person at my job, but my numbers are great. Get your money and go home. Avoid being a work hubby if possible.

  39. Nope. Colleagues are just that.

    Had a woman at one of my previous jobs that kept trying to call me her work husband. I immediately distanced myself and watched my actions around her.

    Would not tolerate it on either side.

  40. I know this will seem like BS but I remember reading somewhere that 40% of work relationships where they refer to each other as work husband or work wife end up cheating on their SO

  43. “Found out” implies that this was something hidden from you, in which case I would consider this not only emotional infidelity but a lie of omission as well. In a GF, that would be enough to end a relationship IMO, in a marriage, it could simply be a sign of things that need working on, but this would depend on other factors. Time invested, previous occurrences, ect.

    Now, if GF is upfront about her guy friend at work and their “work husband” joke and all parties involved are above board and ok with that situation, no big deal. A joke is sometimes a joke, but only if everyone is in on it and laughing. You can have positive platonic relationships with people other than your partner, but if you’re lying or hiding that relationship, you’re cheating.

  45. It is totally unacceptable, I will be bringing this situation up to my work wife.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like