This friend of a friend (20sF) in an online server I’m in really annoys me (26NB), which makes me feel really bad because I try to be kind to everyone, she’s developmentally disabled, and I dislike her for dumb reasons. I just find her to be annoying and irritating with her childish, overly honest, and needy mannerisms. She does things that bother me such as watch the same movie in theaters five times, message the server about literally everything (including TMI topics such as vomit), write low-quality self-insert fan fiction, and ask for a lot of advice. I end up interacting with her out of altruism and not enjoying it, but I feel horrible for not liking her because there is literally nothing wrong with her. How do I stop being an asshole?
1 comment
you can’t force yourself to like people, and disliking someone doesn’t have to be morally wrong. reframe it this way: *why* do those things bother you? maybe your interests don’t align (ie you don’t like the same movies and you aren’t into self-insert fanfiction), TMI topics make you uncomfortable, and giving advice over and over again tends to be tiring. disliking those traits doesn’t make you a bad person and it doesn’t make her a bad or annoying person either.
as long as you’re being kind and inclusive, you’re fine. you don’t have to be her friend and you don’t have to focus on her. when she brings up something you don’t like, just give her some quick validation, change the topic, lead the conversation, and let her be apart of what you’re talking about.