I’ve seen him a few times in parties but he just noticed me in the last party and started having a crush on me. Actually, i ignored him the whole party although he kept asking me to drink with him bc i didn’t know he likes me back.
Now his cousin (my friend) told me he likes me and i might actually see him again this week in my friend’s birthday party and i just feel so nervous. I have social anxiety and i’ve always ran away from these kinda situations so i’ve never even been in a relationship. I dunno how to interact with him when i see him again. When someone touches me or something, i just never know how to react and how i should react. So i just stand motionless (unless it’s a hug. I only know how to hug back). This usually turns off those who are interested in me bc idk how to flirt or how to respond to people’s touches so they just get the feeling that i’m uncomfortable so they back off.
I’m also overthinking this so much. What if he sees me again and be like “this is the one in the party? She doesn’t look THAT good. I must’ve been mistaken about her” or something like this. Or he might see how socially awkward i am and stops having a crush on me. It’s really gonna affect my confidence if this happens and i’m actually thinking of cancelling everything and pushing him away intentionally like i’ve always done before. But he’s just too pretty i wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about him if i do that. And i keep feeling like i don’t deserve him and he’ll notice how i’m beneath him or something. I really don’t know if i’m inferior to him. I might just be overthinking this but he’s so beautiful that it makes me feel like i might be less than him. He also has a lot of experience in dating and it makes me self-conscious bc I’m so inexperienced. I always thought the first person i’m gonna be with is gonna be inexperienced like me so i never expected someone like this.