I recently dated a larger man, biggest man I’ve ever dated and at the end of two months of some pretty great well planned out dates he said he wasn’t really attracted to me anymore and said it could be cause I’m a bigger girl .. for reference I’m 198lbs he’s 330. I don’t get how big people fat shame others 🤔
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Why let someone this goofy take up any space in your head in the first place? Man dated you for 2 mos and went “Actually I’m not even into you and it’s your fault” like what?
Because he’s a hypocrite that’s all
He’s just projecting bc he’s disgusted by himself and wants to take it out on an external source that’s not himself to cope
I can only speak for my fat self and frankly I find big women attractive as fuck. I wouldn’t let this one asshole make you think you’re ugly because of your size.
I don’t get why someone would ever say that. Even if it was the reason, keep your mouth shut. “Hey, I just don’t think this will work out.” That’s enough.
That’s actually hilarious. The lack of self-awareness on his part to say that to you while he himself is morbidly obese is astounding. You dodged a bullet.
The same reason bald men shame women who are balding/have alopecia.
Yep. Happens to me all the time. I get called “sir” by men who know I’m a woman. Meanwhile they are in their 60s-70s and balding and fat and old. But when I mention their hair loss it’s “expected” so it’s “no big deal”.
Woooooow I hate him. I bet you’re lovely
Projection
yeah idk what to say here OP sorry that happened. I’ve usually seen it the other way around so I can’t give much here. Hope you move forward well and continue living life.
I literally wonder this all the time. Same goes for fugly ass men criticizing women around them. It’s fuckin scary and stupid.
He’s a weirdo honestly
Hes definitely an asshole and a hypocrite. He doesn’t like your body type but he has a similar body type himself? Okay 😂
Guys always do this nonsense, like one time I was talking to this guy. This man was covered in tattoos and was talking about how he doesn’t like women with tattoos….I was like, um okay? Lol
I actually don’t have any tattoos and will probably never get any because I hate needles but I don’t shame people who do. Like seriously who tf cares?
Just ignore him girl. He’s full of shit, and is low key projecting.
His insecurities are showing… pfft. Don’t let anyone bring you down! I only *wish* I weighed 198! But I also know I’m hot, sexy and confident as all hell. <3
I actually had a friend that told his gf that she couldn’t keep gaining weight. He was in fact very overweight. I straight out told him he was a pos because he looked awful. He didnt have good hygiene nor dress up & his attitude. He didnt understand till later that it wasnin fact true. He lost weight & he understood that he was wrong. Sometimes ppl project their own feelings onto us.
LOL YEA…. My ex was charity work and yet by far the most shallow person out of all the people I’ve dated. Seriously off putting, some men are so entitled
It’s like short women height shaming short men. Specially when they’re shorter than said short men 😆. I’ve gotten a few on the ole dating apps, they’re 4’11 I’m 5’3 but yet I’m “too short” for them? It’s ridiculous, I’ve noticed this with some bigger women too where they prefer a skinnier or fit looking dude and not into big guys. Like most said on here it’s just them projecting their own insecurities that’s all. No point in paying attention to them. Move on with your life and let it go don’t give them any space in your head or your heart. At least it’s how I’m dealing with these type of rejections these days.
Because they are ashamed of themselves. It is called transposing shame
His self-hate is being projected onto you.
Decent men don’t, I’m a fat guy (5’9″ 240) and not once in my life have I ever critiqued a woman about her size.
What people are attracted to, doesn’t always mirror what they look like. There are some really skinny dudes who are into bigger girls. And vice versa.
But anyone who lines up “could be” with “why I’m not attracted to you anymore” sounds like a douchebag in general. He’s either sure of why his attraction stopped or he’s not. And if he’s truly not, why is he bringing up weight when it could just as easily be something else?
If he’s really not into bigger girls, it begs the question of why date you in the first place?
It’s a double standard for sure, and I would even go as far as to call it narcissistic behavior. I had a roommate who weighed 250 lbs, looked, groomed, lived and ate like Homer Simpson. And yet, he only ever wanted to date slim, highly attractive men who are very fit and take care of their own bodies. Essentially, Calvin Klein lookalike models who are way, WAY out of his league (He’s also gay, obviously). And surprise surprise, his high standards haven’t landed him a relationship ever in his life, and he’s 40 years old. And here he is to this day, declaring that he only sets the highest dating standard for himself, and he’s still single.
He did the exact same thing this guy did too; before I knew him that well, I tried to set him up on a date with one of my friends who’s roughly about his age, is also kind of overweight but is an extremely good person. The roommate immediately shot down the idea, called my friend “gross” (The friend I tried to set him up with isn’t even as fat as he is) and declared that he would never date a fat person, ever. And then of course, the roommate went back to drinking his dozen cans of diet Coke every single day and eating s*** food and not exercising.
People like that are basically shooting themselves in the foot. You can’t control what kind of standards they’re setting, but you can bet that it’s going to bite them in the ass. They’re harming themselves far, FAR more than they harmed you.
I assume they’re doing it because they’re so ashamed and insecure about their own bodies, so they want to be with someone who doesn’t remind them of themselves. That’s my guess. People who are very secure with themselves don’t do things like that.
Damn. Sorry you went through that. I am about 210, and most recently dated a woman of the same weight, though 6 inches shorter. Didn’t bother me a bit. I don’t get it at all. I think that media has shown fat funny guys with skinny women for so long, (Homer and Marge) that they think that is normal. Beauty is beauty. His loss
No one has been quite as cruel to me about my being fat as fat men have. Like, go to therapy and stop projecting.
Anybody who shames anybody about their appearance is dealing with their own insecurities. Would you point out the reason you weren’t physically attracted to someone? Or end it in a kind way? I personally am fine with myself (for the most part) and have absolutely no desire to ever make another person feel bad about their appearance.
Same thing goes the other way though.
A girl with a handsome face that is super skinny will have A LOT more success dating compared to a guy with a handsome face that is very skinny.
I mean if that’s how he feels I’d say you might as well move on. I find it ridiculous for someone to say they “aren’t attracted anymore” when the person they dated was the same weight when they started dating. If they gain a lot of weight, sure, but if they look the same as when you started dating how can you act as though they’re just not physically attractive anymore? So dumb.
OMG THIS. I am not plus sized… HOWEVER I noticed that overweight men fat shame at times and it confuses me