Okay, this is kind of a “am I the asshole” type post. But in reality, I’ve been feeling bad about how I reacted. Me and my bf haven’t been together very long and had only talked roughly a month and a half. We had a really great date night the other night and he looked at me and told me he was in love with me. I… kinda internally freaked out and kinda smiled and said” oh uh, thank you.” I really didn’t know how to react. I haven’t been in a real long term relationship in a long while and im not one to just say it because someone else does. I say it because I mean it and feel it.
We are very happy together and we care deeply for each other but I feel bad. I told him the day after I was sorry for my reaction and he said Maybe he shouldn’t have said anything which made me feel worse. I told him I was glad he told me, and was able to express those feelings but he seemed really hurt.
Am I the asshole? How could I have responded better ?? I want him to be able to express himself and tell his feelings in our relationship this whole thing just took me off guard.
Thanks in advance
6 comments
You should talk to him, tell him how you feel, communicating is key.
I dont think you are, and this is coming from a guy, everyone moves that their own pace.
Maybe to him, and potentially it is still a honeymoon phase, he is getting attached quick. I can understand his sentiment assuming he clicks with you well and everything.
It is better on your part to be honest, at least from how I am viewing it, tell him when you are ready or this is moving too fast and you want to take more time to get to know each other better.
If he is cool with it, then you know you have met someone worth knowing. If you dont get this response, then there may be something else going on.
I really don’t think this makes you an asshole at all. I think you guys are at 2 different stages and that eventually you’ll get there and mean it. But until then you don’t have to say it. I feel a lot like you do and I don’t just say it to anyone and I don’t think I’ll be ready to say it to someone I get involved with that quick either.
I would definitely agree with others that you should talk to him about it and communicate with him. Your response wasn’t rude it just sounds like you were really caught off guard by it and didn’t know what to say in response to it especially if that hasn’t really been on your mind.
I’m dtf and I’m down here for a good head fuck
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Gerhold56
I just can’t compute how people so easily say those words . A month and a half then it’s blurted out….then in no time, he wants to retract it.
Pfffft
My response was ‘Im not there yet, but I do care.’