My husband(53) and I(55) and I, together for 23 years, and used to have a very healthy sex life. Then we didn’t have sex for several years due to big marital issues for a few years (almost got divorced but working on it and it’s much better now), low testosterone for him and menopause for me. (Surgical menopause and I cannot take hormone therapy because of estrogen positive breast cancer at 42 years old).
As we have slowly built our relationship back up, it finally happened. We kind of had sex last night. Meaning touching, kissing and oral sex. But his penis is a pretty good size, and even though I was massively turned on and very wet, my vagina is as tight as a straw. He could only get the tip of his penis in, and I felt like I would need an episiotomy to get it in all the way. We could not finish but we talked about it and it went well. This morning he got a nice blow job, and he has always been able to make me climax, but I want actual sex. The opening to my vagina like if it was a clock-at 6:00) felt like it was going to rip and is still sore this morning. Now that we are back at this part of our relationship, I no longer have to mentally keep it away from my mind, I want sex. And I want it now. I am impatient at this point.
I have looked all over on line and the treatment for painful sex is lubrication methods and hyaluronic acid inserts….. but that is no problem- I can get super wet. The only thing I have seen is a vaginal stretcher on line, and I’m going to the sex shop today because I hope they have one so I can start today.
I don’t know what else to do. When they talk about painful sex, are they talking about the whole vagina or just the opening skin? Should the hyaluronic acid inserts help that part too- even though I have no problem with self lubrication?
I am beyond overjoyed that we are at this point in our journey of a better marriage. I never thought I would be emotionally and physically horny again, having my vibrator as my only friend for a couple of years. Now that that gate is unlocked, I cannot wait any longer. Please help!
3 comments
Sounds like you know what to do, exercises and methods to loosen up the vagina. In the meantime, toys and oral sex, that can be a super satisfying sex life. Also, anal sex can be amazing and give that same feeling of fullness and connection that comes from PIV intercourse, could be something you explore in the meantime until you can ease into PIV.
Read about vaginal atrophy. From lack of sex, age, and absence of hormones.
You can get wet. But how about when you are not having sex, is everything lubricated? I found that gels didn’t do enough, I had to use oils on top.
I found also: the more sex I have less likely I’ll have pain.