I have an incredibly embarassing problem. I’ve been living alone and struggling with depression and OCD since the beginning of covid, and as such my living space has been in disarray much of the time. This hasn’t been a problem to anyone but me – no one else has been here. But I live in university accomodation, where housekeeping does a mandatory clean of our rooms once a week, and after a long pause due to covid they’ve very recently resumed cleaning services. Today I got a knock on my door from the head of housekeeping: apparently, the guy who cleaned my room this morning filed a complaint about me, because I had left my room in an ‘absolutely disgusting’ state.
I’m beyond embarassed. I made a special effort to tidy up the room before the cleaner came, and it’s in a way better state than it’s been in for ages. I genuinely thought it was in a fine condition. But now I’ve recieved the complaint, I understand the problem. My desk was stained with liquids and crumbs, a side table had dry laundry detergent scattered over it, and my recycling bin is full over the top.
This is a big wake-up call for me, but aside from my sorting my shit out for my own benefit, it’s clear to me that I owe the guy who had to clean my room this morning an apology. Aside from the apology itself, I’d like to get him a small gift – he really shouldn’t have had to have dealt with this, and I’m genuinely very regretful. But I’m not sure how to do this exactly, and I’m not sure what to buy. I probably won’t be in when he next comes to clean, so I’m thinking of either leaving a handwritten note with the gift in my room or contacting housekeeping and asking them to forward the gift with a message. I was thinking of buying chocolates or wine or something like that, but I don’t know if he has any dietary requirements or he doesn’t drink, etc.
Can anyone give me any advice on a nice, safe gift I can give, and how I can deliver it to him with an apology?
TL;DR: Left my room in a terrible state, and guy housekeeping complained. I want to apologise, but am unlikely to see him in person when he next cleans; what should I buy him, and how should I get the apology to him?
6 comments
Gift card with a note
First: I’m so sorry that happened to you. I’ve had similar experiences and it’s very embarrassing, but you didn’t do anything wrong, depression is horribly difficult to deal with.
I’d suggest just a box of chocolates or a gift basket of some other food item. You don’t want to go too over the top.
I think seeing the room tidy on his next visit would be a great apology. Maybe with a thank you note so he understands that it has helped you. Cheers
I think the gift card is a great idea.
Definitely gift card. I know you were struggling at the time, but the person who has cleaned your room when it was very dirty is unlikely to want to eat anything like chocolates from a place that was probably quite dirty. It’s a nice thought but they don’t know that you wouldn’t be leaving a tampered gift after they complained about you. Not everyone is so nice. 💕
I do think a note and a small gift card (like a coffee shop visit size GC) would be really appreciated.
It’s also not the case that the same person will clean your room necessarily.
It’s a nice gesture, but I don’t agree that you “owe” it. Mental illness really screws with the executive function that healthy people use to accomplish all their basic chores and responsibilities. The guy is simply assuming that you are perfectly healthy and just lazy– this is exactly how people with mental illness get stigmatized.
You could, if you’d like, leave a thank you note like: “Hey, I am grappling with a serious illness that has made it difficult to keep up on cleaning, and I really appreciate your extra effort to get me caught up on these chores. Thanks for going the extra mile!” Maybe that would be enough to keep him from filing grievances.