So there was a girl I worked with, we were very close but never got intimate. We’d often spend time outside of work with each other and just spent time together, we both truly cared for each other and have a lot of good memories together. I told her I was interested in more and she said she doesn’t feel the same back, after dealing with the rejection I said I would like to continue being friends with her.
A while back I was out with her and some other friends and a girl there started flirting with me, I was into her so I flirted back and we ended up kissing a lot throughout the night. This visibly upset my friend, she acted very jealous and tried to convince me not to get with this other girl. She started being intimate with me and trying to flirt with me so I wouldn’t continue with the other girl.
Later that night, she asked what happened between us and I told her nothing happen, we just kissed. When she learned that nothing else happened. She went back to being as she always had. No intimacy, no attention.
It made me realize something, the only time I had gotten what I wanted from her was when she feared losing me to someone else but at the same time she wasn’t willing to give me the relationship I wanted. I was essentially a source of validation for her.
Later that week, I just flipped and decided I didn’t want to be on the sidelines anymore, I didn’t want to be that guy. I want a relationship and intimacy and everything that comes with it and she is just not going to give me that.
I blocked her on everything.
That was two months ago and we haven’t interacted since, I am moving on and in a clearer headspace, I now see it for what it was.
What sucks is I really liked her, I developed feelings for someone who didn’t feel anything back or wouldn’t care to admit it. It’s my fault as well, I should have established a boundary after I asked for more, I should have told her that I want the full thing with her and if she didn’t want that, I should have moved on.
I am so confused right now, to be this heartbroken over a not even relationship. We really connected even though it wasn’t physical. She had a side to her that was this sweet, caring person that no one else got to see.
1 comment
This is fully on her dude and not you. Too many ppl are like this. They don’t want to be with you but also don’t want you to be with someone else. Avoid all ppl like this. They have their own issues.