18M here, every time my friends open their phones they have like 300 snaps, 15 IG dms, 13 text messages and 17 mentions from tiktok. If you check my damn phone is dry asf.
I even tried texting people but they just reply and never text first. I have even invited people to workout, they went with me and never invited me to workout with them with me.
24 comments
It sounds like you need to find a new friend group. I know. Easier said than done. But if you’re not a person they even ATTEMPT to hang out with, what’s the point? You’re giving, and giving and giving. It’s very one sided anyway.
Keep on making friends. Lots and lots of friends.
Try to befriend a chatterbox?
Subscribe to a lot of stuff with notifications?
I must be getting old (35M). Who even cares about the number of notifications you have? I think the opposite and I think it a red flag if someone has a lot to be honest.
I see people with tons of snap streaks but those are pretty useless in my opinion. It doesn’t make friends
Honestly just stay in contact with everyone you meet. Streaks help because it’s an informal and accepted way to keep in touch with someone every day.
Get a couple few chicks pregnant and then disappear, make sure they have your phone number
Used to feel that way before but now I take pride in having a clutter and stress-free phone. Too many messages are annoying. I also think you have too much time on your hands to kill and you’re just looking for ways to distract yourself. If you wanna, however, compete with your friends, I would suggest keep notifs from Reddit or Google News on to signal that you have a lot going on too. Most of the time, however, those unread messages are the ones that have piled up from them ignoring everyone for days on end before replying
Used to feel that way before but now I take pride in having a clutter and stress-free phone. Too many messages are annoying. I also think you have too much time on your hands to kill and you’re just looking for ways to distract yourself. If you wanna, however, compete with your friends, I would suggest keep notifs from Reddit or Google News on to signal that you have a lot going on too. Most of the time, however, those unread messages are the ones that have piled up from them ignoring everyone for days on end before replying
Used to feel that way before but now I take pride in having a clutter and stress-free phone. Too many messages are annoying. I also think you have too much time on your hands to kill and you’re just looking for ways to distract yourself. If you wanna, however, compete with your friends, I would suggest keep notifs from Reddit or Google News on to signal that you have a lot going on too. Most of the time, however, those unread messages are the ones that have piled up from them ignoring everyone for days on end before replying
Look at this as a chance at life. You don’t need to have messages or notifications from alot of people just to feel like you’re doing something.
You have nothing but, time to focus on your goals towards the future and build a better foundation for yourself to become somebody great.
All those messages on their stuff is just for vanity. It’s shallow dms that they keep unread so they can make it seem like they’re “popular”
Who cares if your phone is dry. Go make some real life experiences with yourself. Don’t take this in a negative way.
If you really don’t want a dry phone, find people who have the same hobby’s as you and genuinely like the things that you do. People genuinely only have like 1-3 REAL friends.
Don’t let “Dm Numbers” dictate your worth as a person. You’re more than that
Bruh. I’m in my late twenties and at most I’d have like 2 notifications from Facebook from some Star Wars fan group I’m part of lmao.
Then again, I’m only ever on FB once or twice a MONTH. I’ve slowed up my social media consumption considerably. If anything, I use the platforms for anything video game/ popular culture related, chime in on any serious in the. news, etc.
Since you’re still young, social media is basically how any in your age group communicate these days.
Eventually, you’ll come around and see having a thousand unread notifications isn’t all that.
Try and be confident and do your own thing. For example, Instead of asking people if they want to workout, say “I’m heading to the gym tonight, you want to come?” Then if they do cool! If they don’t, cool, still go. People are more likely to be interested in stuff that’s happening and they feel they might miss out on
Hey to you. 🙂
Not trying to give you any Pollyanna advice here, and it’s not gonna be everyone’s cuppa tea, but sometimes a radical shift in perspective can end up affecting the lens thru which you view your world. (for the good..duh.) 😉
Read [this comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/intj/comments/13479rz/today_was_a_reminder_that_quite_often_you_can/jih2dcq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) I just posted for similar sitch.
Hey to you. 🙂
Not trying to give you any Pollyanna advice (will be in link) and it’s not gonna be everyone’s cuppa tea, but sometimes a radical shift in perspective can end up affecting the lens thru which you view your world. (for the good..duh.) 😉
Read [this comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/intj/comments/13479rz/today_was_a_reminder_that_quite_often_you_can/jih2dcq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) I just posted for similar sitch.
You’re very lucky, man. Some day I want to have my phone dry too. I consider myself successful on days where I can spend a whole day without using my smart phone. My version of successful life doesn’t have a smart phone in it. So be glad that your phone isn’t bothering you. Also snaps, streaks, DMs don’t mean shit.
Genuine and solid connections happen over IRL conversations. Be best to people you meet everyday. As far as your friends are concerned, it’s better to have no company than bad company. You’ll find your tribe, have patience and keep looking.
The overstimulation is overrated. I prefer back when I could clear my chats and respond. Not I have so many I don’t really care. Less is more with social media. Find a small circle and you’re good.
Agree with some of the above comments. Change your idea of what success looks like. You have way more time to do something productive with your life rather than opining over someone’s tik tok likes. This is a huge problem with our society right now. 90 percent of the stuff on these platforms is not helping people get better. It is shear entertainment value. If I was you delete tik tok, find friends who are truly getting after it (ie being productive and not measuring themselves based on tik tok likes or number of retags of useless info). When you get to my age a “dry phone” is a god send!
Stick it in some water
Also side note a lot of people purposely leave the notifications and don’t check/clear so it looks as if they always have a lot going on
They say that comparison is the thief of joy. Don’t worry too much about what’s going on with other people’s phones, when it comes to your own try to think more about quantity not quality. As long as you get the notifications that matter to you, you’re good. If you sincerely want to get more messages, one thing that might work is messaging more people?
In my case, I was in the “popular” clique, I knew everyone, everyone knew me and we just came back from our exchange year. Now my phone wasn’t the same as OP, but compared to my male friends it was almost dry. Only like my close friends would message me or tag me on Instagram, and at a certain point I started to feel like maybe I was living a lie, maybe I wasn’t that popular or maybe I was just the guy who happens to be nearby the popular guys and yeah that sucks, but also made me realize why that was that way, I was an edgy guy, Juul addict, who really didn’t go out of his way to make an impression or have a fun chat, I just gave for granted that because I was popular, I was likeable. So I just decided to start copying one of my friends who was super easygoing and fun to be around, the kind of guy with whom you speak with and say, what a nice dude. I started to have inside jokes with people who weren’t really close to me. I dropped the edgy bs and just really started to enjoy talking to my friends or people I haven’t given a chance before. I realized I had a better time with people I never thought of talking to than with some of my friends and some of them are my closest friends till this day (3 years later) and we still talk on the phone once in a while. In the end my phone wasn’t loaded with 300+ snaps nor dms, but it wasn’t as dry as before, I was in multiple chat groups and so on. Also, don’t force yourself into people, specifically if you don’t have anything in common with them or you don’t really enjoy talking with them, people who genuinely like you will let you know for sure. So my point is, go meet new people too, I’m not saying ditch your friend group, but also talk to more people It will not only help you with your dry phone problem but will also improve or give you social skill which are essential after high school.
They’re probably not meeting up with those friends as much as you think, it’s likely to be a whole lot of spam texts and emojis rather than deep conversations and event planning.
Ok I got it, sign up for a bunch of services on email, turn on your email notifications, download a bunch of apps, turn on the notifications, and there you got a wet phone