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Trash account yay. I have so many questions I want to ask everyone here for their opinion, and it’s been building up over the year so I finally decided to get one.

For context, my (37m) partner (28m) and I have been dating for just over a year, living together for 3 months. One of our biggest issues is communication. Not for lack of it, but we are just on different wavelengths. My theory is that he does a lot of assuming, in every aspect of our lives, and it gets us in conversational trouble.

Anyway, we use ig mostly for sharing live pics. He was on his way to work, and sent a pic of his starbs in the cup holder of his car, and then I proceeded to share a closeup pic of my coffee cup showing just the bottom half of my cup and the mousepad it was sitting on. Then the following conversation (over 15 mins) happens:

Z – him
N – me

Z: Are business stairs
N: What??
Z: Are you down
N: I’m at my computer. What do you need
Z: Was just asking
N: What??
Z: I’m just asking if u are downstairs
N: Yeah I know, why? Lol
Z: No reason why
N: what made you ask that? Did my cup look like it was on the counter?
Z: Yes it looked it the counters downstairs.
N: Then just say that!
Z: It’s not important.
N: But just say that, it’s so random if you don’t say that
Z: Ok why is that such a problem to you
N: It’s not a problem at all
Z: Ok
N: But it would prevent me from asking a million questions. It’s random and I was trying to figure out where the question came from
Z: No need if it was important I would’ve let u know
N: Well if I’m asking, just answer

Luckily this random conversation didn’t turn into a major issue, but it has so many times it has in the past. It was such a strange thing to not simply answer in the moment. And I feel like I’m always in a mini spin zone with him.

TL;DR – My bf asked an oddball question, didn’t want to tell me why he asked it, after I figured it out I told him just to tell me next time, then he assumed I had a ‘such a problem’ with it.

Let me know your thoughts!