I (25F) just recently learned who my biological father is through a distant (cousin?) on the DNA testing kit/app 23&me. After our conversation of sharing family stories and history, I had a lead to who my biological father was. I hadn’t tried searching for him and didn’t have a hope of finding him previously. My mother only gave me a first name to go off of. Comparing the info I have from the app and researching, I’m almost 95% sure it’s him. Due to family drama, (which I won’t share right now because it doesn’t relate to the story,) I no longer speak with my immediate family and my mother never wanted to share info on my bio father because it would upset her. When I finally found a lead (a last name to put with the first name that I knew of), I found him. He only has a LinkedIn account. He seems to have his own family; a wife and two sons. I know and am okay knowing I won’t ever have a father-daughter relationship, but is it worth reaching out? He was never in my life and left my mother before I was ever born. I’m not bitter or upset about that. It’s hard to be upset with someone you don’t know, but he also didn’t want to be present. I never even considered looking for him before now because I knew how much it bothered my mother. I’ll never have a relationship with her again unfortunately.. So now nothing is really holding me back except, I don’t want to bring drama to his wife and kids. I feel like it’s also unfair for them if I were to suddenly appear. What do you think?
2 comments
He disowned you. No reason to meet him.
What kind of person is your mom? If she’s a good normal human being I’d imagine there’s a reason she kept him from you. If she’s nuts then I’d go and try to talk with him