For context, We grew up in the same area, and started hitting it off, I moved away for school and she was still around our hometown so we put it on pause. We eventually got together and have been together for almost 5 months. We FaceTimed as much as possible and I took a position back home so we could temporarily end the distance.
We always have the best time when we’re together, full of laughs and romantic gestures. Last night she seemed off and I asked her if she was doing okay and she said she was fine, this morning she texts me while I’m at work saying along the lines of “ I want to be honest but I don’t see a future or us growing old together, I love you and I hate having these thoughts”
I sort of explained the whole new relationship and the spark, and how that transitions towards more long term commitment as the relationship progresses, and how we’re also a while away from marriage etc.
It just really caught me off guard and it of course put my guard up, which I hate having, i shouldn’t have to worry constantly about our stability. I told her we would talk about this after work so I can give her my full attention in person (we spend a lot of time together and get along very well with eachothers families. She often spends the night at my place)
I’m wondering if we’ve possibly spent too much time together, and it’s overwhelming? I of course am not perfect but I try my best to be and I told her I’m willing to work on myself while In the relationship to improve how she’s feeling.
*she’s never had a relationship last this long and has never had someone to express emotion too*
Would this be a cause for her to feel this? Just not having this happen before or having something almost brand new?
TL;DR: she said she doesn’t see a future, but still loves me and hates feeling this way. This is her longest relationship and curious what could be causing this.
2 comments
She’s 18. You’re 19. You’re both growing and not necessarily growing in the same direction. It happens, especially at that age. And at 5 months, there’s not much transition like you were explaining, but there is that end of infatuation.
It could be due to her never having a longer relationship, or it could simply (maybe likely) be that 5 months is enough time for her to see enough of you to know that she may love you but is not in love with you now that the infatuation is worn off.
Relationships at your age are just for practice. Your brain doesn’t stop developing until you’re 25 to 27. You’ll be a different person in 5 years.
NEXT!