What can society do to make men feel more comfortable asking for help?

19 comments

1. Men will have to stop belittling others when they look for help; until that happens, nothing will happen.

2. Society needs to:

   A.Stop being afraid of sad, broken desperate men in need of help.

   B. Stop stigmatizing men who need help as lesser men.

3. Don’t shame them for talking about their issues by telling them to “Man Up” and don’t downplay their feelings and issues because “They have it easier”.

   EDIT: It’s werid how we all pretend it’s just men who shame other men for showing emotions.

   Okay if that’s true, then can anyone explain why on a Facebook page called men’s mental health in a post that encouraged men to open up. Had a top comment saying men need to stop whining because they have it easier and the comment was liked by mostly women and the topic was then filled with women users talking about women’s issues instead? Completely changing the topic addressed which was about getting men to open up. Really… It’s just men huh. Women don’t shame men?

   Both sexes shame men in this regard.

4. Stop shaming men who ask for help. Unless it’s moving. Everybody gets 1, after that go fuck yourself.

5. Make it easy for men to seek help in private

6. I dont know about society but tbh i cant even express my emotions within my family.

   Its kind of taboo i guess, where expressing something makes you look weak or like something unnatural.

   I can’t recall when was the last time i ask someone for help on emotional level.

   *** its not like my family refuse to help me out or something, but its mindset where i cant ask help***

7. Men need private ways to process things. Male only spaces would be perfect but those seem to be banned. Men can help other men deal with emotions. It’s what we used to do.

   Men don’t process things like women. We are not women.

8. Actually being able to provide help when asked

9. Nothing, men biggest driving force is reproduction so while women continues to shit on broken men, men as a group have no gain asking for help.

   And more, the entire modern mental health industry is a scan made to be female centric, it do not work for men in the majority of the time.

10. Take accountability personally, because as long as it’s “society” doing it, all the mothers crushing their sons’ emotions into an acceptable box and all the girls telling their boyfriends to stop being weak will be able to stand by and pretend they’re on the guys’ side.

11. Actually help people would be a start

12. Do what the people around me have done: Listen when I ask for advice and help, support me when I take the initiative to better myself through hobbies and therapy, and cheer me on in their subtle ways as I make those little steps towards improving. Normalize the idea that the ‘strong silent type’ should be situational and not a blanket idea for us all, because it’s starving us of the emotional support we’re not always aware we need

13. Stop being so shitty and condescending when we do.

14. Maybe actually care. Nearly any man, when they’re at their lowest, have no one who gives a shit. There’s a few here and there, and I know from personal experience that those of us who served can always reach out to an old battle buddy, and they’ll make time to hear us, but in general, no one gives a shit about men. Change that and things might start to change.

15. Legitimately have help available for them when they ask for it, for one thing.

16. Nothing, because they will continue to be shamed by other men for not taking care of their own shit.

17. Nothing. There is nothing needed to be done. Those that want help will get it. Stop assuming that there is an ISS there with this matter

18. Do the exact opposite of what republicans and conservatives are doing in schools and public places, banning SEL, social-emotional learning. This leads to stunted individuals both men and women that do not know how to healthy process their emotions or seek help for them.

    The issue of toxic masculinity is that it is performative, you are performing traits for other ‘men’ to seem more of a man. Who decides this? Anything you have to perform is inherently not good for that individual. This leads back to the topic of the OP. Asking for help shouldn’t be seen as a sign of weakness, it is inherently stronger to recognize something is wrong and you are actively seeking help. To say that all men have to be tough, have to be XYZ thing leads young boys and men to see this as a flaw.

    And to clarify for all the chuds who are going to get defensive, being a man, doing traditional manly things are in and of themselves not toxic UNLESS they are being done under pretenses that hurt others, including those that do them. You may not want to drink but you get peer pressured, you get called a pussy or something unless you do. You may think cooking is great but that may not be accepted as ‘manly’.

19. it would be nice for the world to stop saying that men are all independent macho dudes that don’t shed tears.