My (f 19) boyfriend (19) just doesn’t take me seriously at all. it could be anything from me saying a fun fact and him telling me it’s wrong (even when it is not) to telling him about my life experiences and him straight up telling me no that’s not correct as if he were in the memory too. earlier today i was talking about my childhood bc the subject came up (i had a very poor childhood). after telling him about the abuse i witnessed between my parents he would just straight up tell me “no way. that didn’t happen”. it gets very frustrating. it was not a shocking no way, he was just straight up telling me it didn’t happen. a less serious incident- we had driven past a rolls royce and i had mentioned that they had been around for nearly a hundred years and he just straight up told me i’m wrong. and after five minutes of going back and forth about who is wrong he finally decided to google it. and what a surprise – i was right. there are many other things that he doesn’t take me seriously on that really do affect our relationship. i just don’t know how to get him to understand how frustrated it makes me. we’re loooking at places to live and i do not know if i should take this as a red flag to consider before i move in with him.
10 comments
Why are you involved with a guy who doesn’t respect you, who dismisses your lived experience and needs to be “right” all the time?
I don’t understand why you would want to be with someone like this. This sounds *exhausting*.
I can understand why these things would begin to get to you and make you feel unimportant and not valued by him. It seems like he doesn’t respect you or your thoughts and has a need to be right on a matter even when he isn’t, just because he doesn’t want to tell you that you were right about something.
OP, you’re young. You don’t need to put up with this kind of disrespect for the rest of your life. I see you’re planning on moving in together: let me ask you, what are his redeeming qualities? What are the top five reasons you would like to move in with him?
Toxic masculinity. Tell him that he doesn’t know better than you about your own life, and dump him.
You’re 19. Stop wasting your time and dump him.
Sounds like an asshole, move on.
You don’t need him to understand how frustrating his behaviour is, you yourself need to understand that he does not care and will probably never change. Never waste your energy on those who always have to be right because that means you’ll always have to be wrong..
Leave him girly. Agreeing with the person that says he doesn’t respect you and i’m adding that he will not have the ability to respect you anytime in the near future. I say, save yourself time, and break up with him (gently if u must), and live your life! 🙂 someday someone’s going to appreciate the random little things you know and listen to what you have to say, wholeheartedly!!!
Dear God it irritates the ever loving fuck out of me when somebody tries to correct another person in regards to personal experience! There was this dude I was friends with on Facebook who was constantly trying to educate me on heroin addiction and everything that goes along with it. According to him, my having actually been a heroin addict for over ten years meant nothing. He knew better than me in regards to the subject due to his having read about it. Did not matter that I actually lived it for a significant amount of my life, I was wrong…about what I had personally experienced..
And he knew this because he read about it!
How on earth have you not screamed at this kid, dear god. What an insufferable asshole. Dump him and tell him it’s because he’s a condescending weirdo