I had this coworker that I was somewhat close with and she left the company about a year ago. When we were saying goodbye she seemed genuine in wanting to keep in touch, gave me a big hug and said how much she’d miss me, and even sent out an office wide email asking everyone to keep in touch and she even put down her personal email.
Several months later I emailed her, asked her how she was doing, and gave a few updates on what had been happening around the office. She never replied.
I know that people tend to say “keep in touch” with no actual intention of doing so, but we worked together for 12 years and I really wanted to stay in touch with her. I haven’t contacted her since I sent that email but it’s been another several months so I was thinking about trying again, this time just sending her a message on LinkedIn.
Just wondering what everyone here thought about it. I generally have anxiety about reaching out to people, so this is extra difficult.
2 comments
I get your anxiety around this topic. The only thing you can control is your actions, not how the other person will respond.
If you’re open to it, send an email asking if she’s ok, using terms such as “I hadn’t heard from you in a while since my first email, I just wanted to make sure you were doing ok”.
This should be disarming, and hopefully prompt a response if she’s actually interested in continuing the conversation.
As for her not emailing you back, you never know what might be happening in her life, she could have read the email and forgotten to reply, and now it’s been months… If you give her grace and ask her, you will find your final answer.
In my experience, ‘keep in touch’ usually means ‘you can fuck off now’.