for some context i (20F) and my boyfriend (24M) have been dating for 1 year. everything started great and it’s still going pretty ok. we made it officially known to everyone we were dating when he got me flowers on Vday and i posted it and tagged him so he can repost it (his idea). i personally didnt wanna show off my relationship so soon but he kept seeing guys sliding into my dms (i didnt respond while dating) and he just felt more comfortable if i posted the flowers so guys that i follow know im taken i guess. a month after that we went to a soccer game and took a photo and he really wanted to post it to show me off to his instagram. this made me feel good and secure so early on because he was treating me so good and wanted everyone to know about me…green flag right?
after some time (maybe a month)he made a comment when we were on a date that “i never post him”. I was like ok lets take a selfie and ill post it. which we did. i tagged him in the photo cuz he wanted to post it too then he’s like ill post it later. long story short, he “posted it later” to block some girls off his story. I was very confused because he was the one who wanted to start with the social media photos. anyways, i found out that then he unblocked them when he posted other stuff. then everytime he posted or reposted me he would make sure i wasnt looking at his phone. i figured out hes blocking these group of girls everytime he posts me.
Lets call one of the girl’s michelle
then a few months have passed and i found out that a photo of him was posted on Michelle’s instagram and the photo was of them on a jetski together before we met. but it was still posted. i asked him who she was and he just said someone he used to talk to and doesnt anymore after he met me. i asked him to just message her to remove the photo now that he has a gf and he made this into a big fight and didnt talk to me for two days for “snooping” and asking about someone from his past and asking him to message her. he said he hadnt talked to her in a year and he didnt want to because she means nothing to him and to just block her page and forget i saw that photo.
this really broke my heart because we have literally met eachothers families already and he makes it so obvious that im the one for him but he doesnt wanna show this random girl he supposedly just met on vacation that he has a girlfriend now and wont get his photo removed from her ig.
fast forward to my birthday, two days after the fight, he messaged me happy bday and asked to see me. he posted a selfie with me on his story… and he blocked MICHELLE and her friends again
I am so confused. the way he talks to me and about me makes it seem like hes in love with me and he treats me amazingly but he is always blocking this michelle girl off his story and he has had a past with her. i am not sure what this means please help.
tldr; my boyfriend blocks a girl he had a past with from viewing the photos he posts with me and doesn’t see a problem with the fact he’s still posted on her instagram
8 comments
I feel like he has unresolved feelings but you can’t be too sure these days.
Maybe ask her about it? It’s definitely shady behavior but I don’t think he’s cheating.
I’m so confused he’s blocking her cause he doesn’t want her in his business (though I mean he can’t keep that up forever surely) but you are annoyed at him for not messaging her to take down a photo? Either way it’s a photo from way back what are you upset about.. he had a past before you, she will want to keep memories of the past, just don’t go on her page if you don’t wanna see him years ago
>i found out that he was on Michelle’s instagram and the photo was of them on a jetski together before we met. but it was still posted. i asked him who she was and he just said someone he used to talk to and doesnt anymore after he met me. i asked him to just message her to remove the photo now that he has a gf
… what.
Your ask is unreasonable, so I’m a bit concerned how accurate the rest of your post is. You don’t get to control what other people post to their insta. She absolutely does not need to delete photos of them, and you really have no right to ask that of her.
The whole blocking and unblocking aspect is pretty messed tbh, but if you still feel like you can put up with it because there are more positive sides to this relationship, then you might as well find a different approach to make him understand what you feel
Yeahhhh you don’t get to make him ask her to take the photo down.
All my exs profile photos of the pair of us are still there because he is a lazy idiot and hasn’t taken them down. It is what it is.
However. The blocking her off his stories etc when you’re involved makes me think
He’s trying to keep her as a back up option.
Message Michelle. You’ll get more honest answers that way. Just be prepared for your relationship to fall apart afterwards.
1. You don’t get to tell someone else what they can and can’t post on their own social media. You need to get over that like immediately.
2. I don’t understand the thought process of “posting a picture to block someone”. That doesn’t make sense…..just block them
3. Blocking certain individuals (especially other women that he used to be involved with) seems rather shady to me.
4. How are you so keenly aware of who he is blocking from seeing his posts? Are you going through his phone?
Does Michelle know about you? If he has to block someone every time before he posts a picture of you, he should let it go. He is not honest with his past with Michelle and not honest with his future with you. Why does he allegedly have no contact with her anymore? I guess she dumped him and shouldn’t know that he’s in a relationship with you. This would reduce the chance of getting back together with her or she wouldn’t want to know anything more from him.