Is it right to expect to be reciprocated?

All I am going to talk about happened a couple months ago, with my first ever partner.

It was an entirely long distance relationship, we’re not even from the same country so it was impossible to ever get enough money to visit her. At some point in our relationship we started occassionaly sexting, and I mean occassionaly like once or twice per month. This lasted for like 11 months until one night while sexting she asked me if I could send her a video of me masturbating. Truth is that I was somewhat excited. She had said before she was against sending or receiving nudes so I just assumed this was her wanting to take our relationship to the next level. So I did as she asked and sent the video.

Long story short, she saw a third of it, gave a passing comment on it, ignored it for the next 2 weeks, and then deleted it. Truth be told, I was devastated at that. I felt like I had been used and ignored after I left myself be the most vulnerable with someone than ever before in my life. Regardless, I swallowed my feelings and figured it was all good. (I now know I shouldn’t have but oh well) Regardless, I still thought we had taken an extra step on our relationship so this time I asked her for a video, not even one with her being nude just something kind of raunchy. And she said she didn’t want to. I didn’t push things further and left it at that.

For the next 6 months this didn’t sound strange at all until I was venting about my ex to some friend and she was surprised to hear my ex never sent me anything explicit. (I had told them about my video before). She told me that stuff like that usually went both ways and after talking for a bit more I agreed with her. Based on all this I think I’ve come up with a golden rule for the future that’s:

Never ask for more than you’re willing to give and don’t give more than they’re willing to give you.

Is this way of thinking alright? Am I being too short sighted?