If an ex you hadn’t spoken to since the breakup reached out and wanted to get coffee, apologize, and form a friendship or acquaintanceship, would you meet up?

Would it depend on which ex it was?

45 comments

  1. I reached out to an ex once. It reminded me why I left. I’d be open to it but no expectations. I would be more open to the ones who dumped me rather than the ones I dumped. But still, why are you coming back? Better be ready to have that conversation.

  2. I have one ex and I hope I never hear from her again, I do not want her to reach out to me at all

  4. I’m not going to tell you how to live your life.

    Look in the mirror, evaluate the breakup, and answer your own question. Don’t expect us to tell you what to do.

  5. Any of the ex fiancées? I’d rather cut my junk off then spend a single minute with them voluntarily.

    A ex girlfriend? still friends with one even. Kept the dnd group going still. A few I’d be up to meeting agin if asked.

  6. depends on the ex

    my last one, maybe if i knew i could punch her in the throat and no repercussions, otherwise, i’d avoid her

    for the majority though, wouldn’t matter i’m sure we’d talk for a day and that’d be it

  7. This happened to me via email.

    It read like it was an assignment from her shrink or part of a 12-step program.

  8. “Thanks, not necessary.” They’re apologizing to make themselves feel better, that’s all. I’ve moved past it.

  9. “Hi Bonnie. Take your apology and shove it up your ass. And stop dyeing your fucking hair blue, it looks like shit. Venomous creatures in the wild usually color themselves brightly. Guess humans do it too.”

  10. Tried it once and things went south, so now I just don’t respond to anyone who reaches out.

  11. Depends on which one.

    There are a couple I’m still on speaking terms with but wouldn’t mind an admission of, “Yeah, that was my bad,” from.

    Then there’s the one that I would rather drag my balls through a mile of broken glass than ever see her face or hear her voice again.

  13. Since we didn’t necessarily end things on a good note, I don’t think that would be a great idea. It’s kind of messed up when they tell you they never loved you and only told you they did because they knew it made you happy, but never would feel the same way, you did about them. And pretty much tell you to your face that you needed to surround yourself with people that would make you happy because they knew this was going to be hard for you to except.

  14. depends on the ex. but for most cases. nah,could turn into an argument as its probably really intense between the two. u will get nothing out of it either.

  15. No thanks. I’ve move on. No ill will, have a good life but I am not interested.

  16. Some id be confused on why they’re apologizing because the relationship was pretty solid and things just weren’t going the way they needed too. So I’d probably try to reassure them over certain things

    Others I’d tell em to off themselves

  18. This is just me, but

    If I look at the message with a genuine feeling of “huh. okay”, then I’d probably go out for a cup of coffee. I have spoken to all of my five exes, including the mother of my kids, and I made not much of it. Getting back together was never an option.

    If I look at the message with the feeling of “oh shit what do I do”, I would DEFINITELY steer away from it.

  19. Definitely depends on the circumstances. If it was the one from last summer who just suddenly wasn’t feeling it anymore I’d definitely give her a chance. It’s entirely possible she had some troubles in her life that caused her to leave, it was way too new (about 2 months) to necessarily trust or rely on each other for huge life problems. Much easier to just part ways and sort things out at that phase. If it was the one who showed no growth or changing of habits towards being a functioning adult over several years (and her parents lived the same way), then no, I’m not falling for that again.

  20. I would. I’m connected with two exes on social media already. A couple I would be wary of, but I’d give them a chance to say what they want to say and then decide what to do from there. I’m not interested in restarting a romantic relationship with any of them, but I’d be willing to be acquaintances or even friends with all of them.

  22. Probably be like thank you and move on, since I’m married now.

    When I was single, if I wasn’t actively with someone I’d accept a makeup sex of sorts but I wouldn’t let it lead into another relationship.

  23. Been through it. Turns out she just wanted a date to a wedding. After I told her I wouldn’t be able to make it to the wedding because of prior plans, she ghosted me again.

    Edit: For the record. We broke up because she “got bored with the relationship” and stopped talking to me. Her words, not mine. (I couldn’t afford to drive up to visit her because she had just visited me, and I was still broke from it.)

  24. Accept the apology, apologize for the shit that I did wrong as well, wish them the best and leave it at that.

  25. As long as she didn’t want to get back together then yeah i would be down

    I’m a very forgiving person, I never forget what someone does to me, but I’m very quick to forgive. If someone can come around and realize they were in the wrong, and admit it to someone, then that’s respectable and im here for it

  26. I really appreciate you apologizing to me. Thank you and I forgive you.

  27. I believe Clive Owen said it best in Closer “Thank you, thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off and die.”

  28. I’m pretty sure that happened to me already, and she just poured salt straight into the wound, I let her hurt me once last time. Maybe it doesn’t actually feel like it because she did that. Or because I didn’t let her get away with it, considering she was cheating on her boyfriend in the process

  29. this happend to me twice. One got my hopes up and hurt me even more and the other one I just find really annoying so due your self a favor and ignore and block them.

  30. Meh- not interested in handing out closure to any of the clowns. A continuation of the selfish bullshit that split us up in the first place. 🤷‍♂️ don’t do it

  32. I would tell her that everything she may have done is already forgiven. Forgiveness does not mean that I would ever want to spend a minute in a room with her. It just means that I don’t harbor hatred, or anger towards her. I can manage not hating someone without meeting them, or considering them my friend. The purpose of my forgiveness is not making them feel better about anything. And even though it’s purpose also isn’t to hurt anybody, true forgiveness, in many cases, is the single heaviest burden to carry, for someone whose wrongdoings are forgiven.

  33. I had one ex send me a message on FB apologizing for being immature when we were together. I didn’t reply because I knew it would make my wife uncomfortable for me to do so.

  35. I’ve had an ex text me multiple times to say sorry and how I’m doing and etc. I didn’t want to talk at all because it had been years already and I was already moved on. My recent ex of 3 yrs wanted to stay in touch and meet but he never saw or realized the pain he brought to me, always said “no you’re wrong” so, I never wanted to see or hear from him again. But I’ve also been on the opposite side and reached out to two Exs because I wanted to grab a bite because there wasn’t enough closure for me. But they rejected me, it hurt like hell to never get that closure or communication, especially when you just have good intentions and you just have a feeling that person will hate you forever. so I know how it feels on both sides and it’s not a good feeling. That feeling sticks with you forever.

  36. It’s never too late to come clean and take accountability for past actions. I don’t believe in “too little, too late.” I’m a forgiving guy by nature, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Nor do I think that it makes me a pushover by not being guarded, jaded, and angry about things said and done months or years in the past. People change, people grow. The ex of yesteryear may be a much different person than they are today.

  38. I’d tell her yes and make a plan to meet up. At this meeting I would make planes for us to go on a cross country road trip to rekindle our relationship. On the road preferably in the middle of nowhere, I’d pull in to get gas and I ask her to go in and get some road snacks then pull out tiers screeching and drive back home without her. See ya bitch👋🖕

    Eh I guy can dream I guess.

  39. 2 of them is a hard no, but one of them I’d be down to have a real friendship with

  40. Be the bigger person and accept the apology.Hopefully then that little door can be left open if so desired.Never any harm in allowing someone to at least make amends.lt is only fair that going forward you dictate the level of friendship and acceptance, that will always be a unknown situation for both people.lf you only part with a more amenable feeling towards each other then that is better than bitter resentment.Hatred is so time absorbing, tiring and wasteful but sometimes the hurt is too deep, in that case no contact is the only way but believe me a apology can work wonders over time.

  41. I would not reply, just block them and I wouldn’t even read what they have to say.

  42. Accept the apology if it seemed sincere, decline the invitation and then block the new number that, for some reason, isn’t already blocked.

    Her old manipulation tactics won’t work on me anymore.

  43. Depends on how it ended. I have let girls apologize to me before over coffee or whatever. I would even if I were with someone else. Its not like I’m gonna leave my now girl. I’ll even tell her an she can come if she wants. I don’t care.

    However, there is one that I wouldn’t entertain for a second. She can apologize over text if she is desperate, but I’ll not see her ever again.

  44. It would definitely depend on the ex.

    I probably wouldn’t with any of them, even if the breakup was amicable. They’re exes for a reason and it’s too easy to fall back into unhealthy patterns.

  45. I will just reply: OK

    and that’s it.

    Once she start ruining my day by disturbing me, that’s where the blocking starts

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