I kind of hate the type of person I am, I know deep down I’m nice and respectful etc. (Sounds up my own ass, I know) But no matter how hard I try to be nice and all this I just can’t, I just end up being a dick because it’s easier, and I hate that. I hate not being nice to people but when I try to be nice I feel so stupid I just want to cry right then and there, but when I’m rude, I still want to cry, but not right then and there, so im rude, and after, I get home stare at my ceiling, lay on my bed and listen to music all day. I’m quite literally in my own little continuous loop.
Is it possible to change this..?