So this is something that I’ve noticed. She always says ” I have a headache ache” and when I still try to continue the topic (because I don’t know about women and when I have a headache I can still continue to talk) “you don’t care about my headache, you only care about yourselves”. So is this a pattern or Am I really inconsiderate.
Edit: if I’m inconsiderate, please advice me how to handle this so that it’s a win win for both of us and we have a healthy conversation. I have a hard time bottling up. For me I’ve to talk it out and my girl is the opposite so it’s been hard. I want to learn to control myself. Please help with your wisdom guys.
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Either; they actually have a headache or they just don’t want to talk about it. Just use the same tactic when you’re in their position.
It’s not about “I am physically capable of speaking when I have a headache” it’s about being in a pain/a bad mood and then someone brings up some bullshit that will make it worse, nobody wants to have a bad conversation when they feel bad in the first place.
You are being fairly inconsiderate though, you clearly see the pattern and understand she doesn’t want to talk but you push anyways, that’s self-centered at best.
Sounds like a you problem tbh
It would be inconsiderate to keep pestering someone who has a headache, but it sounds like she picked that as a reason because “I’m sick of talking about this right now” doesn’t work.
Instead of talking about whether she can listen through a headache or whether you’re ignoring her headache, tell her that it seems like she doesn’t want to talk about this now, but it is important to you. Ask if you can continue the conversation when she’s feeling better tomorrow.
Whether she has a headache or not, you’ll be heard a lot better that way.
If it’s a random occurrence, then yeah, you may be a tad dickish to push the conversation, if it is everytime you try discuss an issue over a large timespan then she can’t accept any personal responsibility.
These leaves you with 2 outcomes.
1. Your a dick and need to chill
2. She thinks she is beyond reproach.
Either way there is a big problem
I think there are two things you could do, first change “women” for “my partner”, second, go talk to them, not some strangers on the internet.
This is something people do to get out of having any real conversation. If this is a constant thing you should drop the person
You want to have conversations she doesn’t want to have. You are exhausting her.
Tell me if I’m right. You bring up a topic like abortion. You have an opinion on it, she has a different one, and you debate with her until she says she has a headache. How am I doing so far?
It’s important to approach this topic with sensitivity and avoid generalizations. While it may be true that some women experience headaches when discussing disagreements, it’s certainly not a universal trait for all women. People of all genders can experience headaches or physical discomfort during stressful or difficult conversations.
When someone says they have a headache or express physical discomfort, it’s important to take their words seriously and show empathy. Pain or discomfort can affect an individual’s ability to engage in a conversation effectively. It’s not necessarily that they are using it as an excuse to avoid the topic or invalidate your concerns.
To handle this situation and promote healthy communication, here are some suggestions:
Respect their physical condition: If your partner says they have a headache or feel unwell, try to be understanding and postpone the conversation for a more suitable time. Show empathy and offer support instead of pushing the discussion when they’re not feeling well.
Choose the right time: Find a mutually agreeable time when both of you are in a calm and relaxed state. It’s essential to have conversations when you both can give each other undivided attention and be open to understanding each other’s perspectives.
Active listening: When you do have a conversation, practice active listening. Allow your partner to express their thoughts and feelings without interruption. Seek to understand their perspective rather than immediately trying to prove your point.
Use “I” statements: Instead of making generalizations or accusatory statements, focus on sharing your own feelings and concerns using “I” statements. For example, say, “I feel frustrated when…” instead of “You always…”
Maintain respect and empathy: Throughout the conversation, strive to maintain a respectful and empathetic tone. Remember that you both have valid feelings and perspectives, even if they differ. Treat each other’s viewpoints with respect and kindness.
Seek compromise: Look for solutions or compromises that satisfy both of your needs. Remember that a healthy conversation doesn’t always mean you have to agree on everything, but rather find a middle ground where both of you feel heard and respected.
Seek professional help if needed: If you consistently struggle with communication and find it difficult to handle conflicts, consider seeking the guidance of a couples’ therapist. A professional can provide tools and strategies tailored to your specific relationship dynamics.
Remember, healthy communication requires patience, understanding, and the willingness to work together. It’s important to respect each other’s boundaries and find ways to engage in constructive conversations that nurture your relationship.
they dont, she does because shes manipulating you. just get a new partner
Sounds like dishonesty, especially considering your other posts. Headache may be code for not wanting to consider your position.
If it is truly a headache (stress can do this), then she should be willing to commit to another time to finish discussing the topic.
If it’s something that does not matter by the time that future time comes around, then you have to consider whether you shoukd have been arguing about it in the first place.
its dismissive and she does not want to continue talking about it because she thinks you are wrong and she is right