How do you get comfortable with being alone?

50 comments

1. You grab your balls and you do it.

2. Do whatever you want, when you want, for as long as you want.

3. You just do. In my opinion, find a hobby / interest to occupy a time or get a pet.

4. Single people often think they won’t be lonely in a relationship, but that’s not the case.

   Relationships can be much more lonely than being single, because you keep thinking it will get better. You keep thinking that you must be doing something wrong, and if you could just “fix it”, everything would be okay. But it never is.

   And you think maybe you should leave, but you’ve invested so much, and don’t want to think that it was all for nothing. So you cling to nothingness.

5. Hobbies, reading, projects. It’s kinda freeing though, just do what you wanna do and don’t need to check with anyone

6. I stay so busy there is no time for anyone else in my life, keeps me from thinking about it.

7. I don’t. I still feel like there’s something missing and I do try to fill that void.

8. I enjoy my own company.

9. It just happened. I have hobbies that take a lot of my time.

10. Music. The lifelong ally, for every emotion.

11. It’s incredibly difficult. I recommend taking up a long-term project that takes up all your time. That helps me forget that I feel alone.

12. Being socially exiled for four decades

13. You get used to, confort might vary from time to time.

14. Use Hermit crab metaphor, they don’t go too deep into the sad ocean to the point of no return, and not too far into scorching dry land exposed to predators, you just have to find your sandy bay. And have so e faith and patience if your shell of a home is too small eventually you’ll find a bigger one

15. BY accepting the fact that you are alone and no ones is coming to save you and you don’t get people /relationships near you as a miracle .

16. For me, I just do it. But, I try to spend as much time as I can outdoors.

17. For me, the question’s always been… how do I get comfortable not being alone, ie. around other people?

    I think it’s a personality thing, and perhaps mostly preordained

18. I came to the realization that there some things you’ll only learn by yourself than amongst others like what kind of person you truly are, your interests, thought process & etc. Also, I learned that there will be times where you’ll truly be on your own that you’ll need to know how to manage somehow without anyone’s help too.

19. Total freedom.

    Save your money.

    No woman to nag you, get all emotional or otherwise ruin your life.

20. I’m using the alone time to prepare myself both mentally and physically for my next relationship – if it ever comes. I don’t want to repeat the same mistakes. Sometimes it’s good to learn from the past.

    Even if I’m single for the rest of my life, I want to live the best way I can – not for someone else, but for myself.

21. Find the right lube and video.

22. TV, maybe porn, reading books, exercise, an at-home business…the list goes on.

23. Think of all the stuff you can do unimpeded!

24. Keep yourself busy. Work, gym, hobbies what ever. It’s harder to feel bad about yourself when you’ve got things to do. I spent time working why I felt alone in therapy and finding ways to connect with people helps.

    Also shitposting in discord servers helps sometimes.

25. Never become a problem to me, especially after spending a good full 8 hours in the work palce, being alone in the house is the best feeling ever.

26. For context, I’m by nature introspective and introverted (though I can hold my own socially).

    I use the time to connect with myself and check in. Mindfulness, staying present, doing a physical activity, enjoy music, eat / make good food. Very into engaging physically because I’m usually in my head by nature and for my line of work.

27. I like spending time alone. Healthy me time is important for me. But when i just want that special person to wrap my arms around and i dont have access to it…those times are when being alone eats me up.

28. idk if you only smoke weed, but having more hobbies and interests than that may help. being in nature also

29. If you have more than one really interesting hobby, then it’s fine

30. Not much of a choice.

31. Workout/diet routine, video games, watch shows whatever the fuck I wanna do.

32. By being//becoming a person *you* can // want to be alone with.

33. I’ve always been more comfortable alone, so I don’t have a great answer to this. But I think it’s very important to learn, the same way it’s important to be comfortable with others.

34. Being alone these days is heaven on earth.

    You can do what you love for as long as you want without anyone complaining or without any need that you need to make adjustments to someone else who might not appreciate it.

    If u get into moments where u feel the need to have a gf…majority of ladies of the night offer a gf experience and she leaves in the morning…absolutely glorious.

35. Drugs and hookers.

36. By realising that there is a vast difference between being alone and being lonely.

    … And (at least for me) realising that if I suddenly died, nobody would find my corpse until it was bloated, leaky, and smelly 🤷🏼.
    Being british, that is a slight concern because i would not want to cause a fuss, even in purifying stinky death.

    Um… The first paragraph is actually probably helpful.

37. By knowing that most other people are going to be *work* to keep in my life and I’d rather do my own shit that has a lower chance of letting me down.

38. Easy for me because I’m hilarious…in my opinion.

39. You get comfortable.
    You do you, have fun, enjoy yourself, do what you want.
    It gets easier and when you will truly be comfortable alone, then you will grow even more comfortable.

40. It’s about not giving a fuck. Living life without boundaries (till you actually have to put them).
    You can do whatever you want, when you want, as long as you want at any place.
    I used to go to the club on my own. The idea was that I could just walk in, get myself a drink and dance on the dancefloor without anyone ever remembering who I was that night. I’m a stranger who is just enjoying his time. In some strange ways, I would always end up talking to someone. Men. Women. anyone. Doesn’t matter. I dance with people that entire night and eventually return home knowing I had a good time dancing and meeting people. Never disappointed, because I never had expectations.

41. Spend more time being alone and doing thing by yourself. Be confident in everything you do.

42. Liking yourself so your own thoughts won’t bully you and shit

43. I’ve always been comfortable with being alone. It’s getting comfortable being with people that’s the tricky party for me.

44. Start hanging out with reallly shitty, needy friends. You’ll be grateful for every moment you can get away from them.

45. As many others have said, do whatever you want whenever you want (this might not always work in practice because work, bills etc but it’s geat in theory). Personally, I like videogames, motorcycles, fishing, hiking and I’m currently saving up to get into hunting. If I’m not at work or sleeping I’ll usually be out riding or hiking somewhere deep in the woods, and it’s extremely freeing, though I still get a bit lonely at times.

46. Try to concentrate on my hobbies. But often I just don’t have the energy to even do that.

    I look around me and realise that I have no one to share them with, so what’s the point?

47. I realized being around other people is exhausting mentally and physically.

48. Invest, in, yourself. And by that I mean learn, learn everything and anything that you can, anything that peaks your interest, find books, watch youtube, spend a little money on whatever your learning and gain a skill. I’ve gone from hockey, and hunting, fishing, reloading, knives and steel sharpening, too wine tasting, leather shoes and leather care, music/audio equipment, and building computers. There are more but those are the main ones. Its a huge world out there, find something you enjoy and dive in.

49. Take time to find things you enjoy and do them, then the days roll by.

50. I moved from a shared house with a group of friends, into a house by myself, out in the countryside about 10 years ago.

    It was a bit tough in the beginning, but after a few months you totally adapt and get used to it, and you become less dependent on others, and it’s great.