What do you do when a person you’ve gotten emotionally attached to ends up being a bad person?

13 comments

1. [removed]

2. If I am not afraid of that person, I confront them, tell them why I am not comfortable associating with them any longer, and then sever contact.

   If I am afraid of that person, I do not confront them. I simply make a plan to extricate myself from the situation gradually, and then ghost them as soon as it is safe for me to do so.

   Life is too short to surround yourself with bad people.

3. I did it. You have to cut them off or accept their behavior. There’s no other choice. If you do cut them off it’s going to hurt for a while, but with time you’ll be able to remember all the good times you spend together, without feeling sick, angry or hurt.

4. It depends on the context; how bad and what their behaviour involves.

   Someone who hates all children and seems to enjoy telling every adult who they know is a parent or fond of their young sibling/nieces/nephews. But hs never done anything that is illegal or threatening?

   A noisy, foul mouthed and toxic conspiracy theorist nuisance who 1/4 of the time is very verbally confrontational but never resorts to any violence or harassment of a specific person.

   Or a two faced criminal who puts on a socially acceptable veneer but is also an unhinged and prolific sender of criminal hate mail/online threatening messages to the overweight or any social outcast that they dislike the look of/rumours about.

5. [removed]

6. Cut them and just work through the heartache

   Was in love with a guy so deeply, found out he was secretly a huuuuge piece of shit and did awful things to good people :

   It sucked, but I got over it.

7. Divorce him.

8. Walk away.

   Think of it like a Tv series that has 17 seasons. You are loving the first few seasons. Then, you realize you are watching it because it is easy to just turn on. When it gets boring and bad – you are allowed to just shut off the Tv.

   Just walk away. Just because you have spent months or years with a person, you can just move on.

9. [removed]

10. You got to find a way to move on. I had this experience before. It was hard but I found someone better. So will you!

11. I was in love with him. I was honestly obsessed. But I was also young and I got groomed. He ended up being a serial predator and is in jail now. It took me until getting a phone call saying that he was in jail over the weekend and about what had happened (him and a 15 year old) to realize that I needed to sever that line.

    It took me months to come to terms what had happened with me and I knew that I needed to do something about it, call him out. I reached out to a friend and had my story posted anonymously via her account. This inspired others to come forward.

    So what I’m telling you from this story is: reach out to others in your life, who may or may not know the person in question. Sometimes others can help make things you can’t see very clear. And they can offer you emotional support while you’re setting boundaries or cutting ties.

    Seek professional help, discover more about yourself, and you’ll get to the point where you’re able to at least acknowledge that chapter in your life.

    I hope this is helpful to you.

12. Nothing to do but to cut your losses and move on.

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