Me (21F) and my boyfriend (21M) have been together for almost three years. We go to the same university and started dating during his freshman/my sophomore year. Now I’m graduating and planning on attending the same university for my master’s. He’ll be in his last year of undergrad.
For the past year, we have lived in the same apartment building. We each have a roommate and a 2 bedroom apartment. He stays over at my place around 4-7 nights a week. It’s basically been like this since we started dating. Our parents help us out with rent and we are generally in similar places financially.
My roommate for the past two years is moving out at the end of the year, so I will need to find other living arrangements. My boyfriend suggested that we rent a 1 bedroom apartment for the two of us next year.
On the surface, I absolutely love this idea. We have acted like we live together for the past three years. A 1 bedroom would be significantly cheaper than a 2 bedroom. We regularly talk about our future–family plans, finances, etc. I believe we communicate well and know how to express ourselves when arguments do arise. However, I still feel pretty young to be moving in with someone. I know every situation is different, but when I do research into this topic I see suggestions that you should wait until you’re older and more mature. While this has never happened before, I can imagine the possibility of wanting some alone time away from each other which would be more difficult if we lived together officially.
I love my boyfriend and our relationship so much so I want to make sure I’m taking everything into consideration while making this decision. What considerations should I make while trying to make this decision? Are we old enough to take this step?
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TL;DR : My boyfriend and I want to move in together but I’m worried it’ll mess up our relationship because we’re pretty young.
2 comments
If you feel deep down that you’re not ready, that’s okay. Our opinions do not matter, truly.
I moved in with mine at 21 and we’re getting married in a few weeks just after I turn 25, but if you don’t feel ready then that’s nothing to do with age – just not being ready. Remember most general “advice” is people projecting their own experiences onto others and you can take it or leave it and decide what’s right for you.