Whether it be an internal monologue (how men think about nothing), how you handle situations or arguments, how you go about your days, a specific topic, a certain theme, etc. I, a female, am wondering how wrong (or how accurate) men are portrayed from actual male POV’s.
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ETA: Damn, didn’t expect this many responses especially since reddit only sent me a handful of emails compared to the amount of comments here currently. Especially since it’s only been roughly 21 hours since I posted this. I appreciate all the comments though so thanks to all who added (and hopefully those who will add more). From the several I skimmed this morning in my email, they were definitely what I was expected/hoping for a character I’ve had in my head for a story I’m writing for fun. But I can’t wait to read all of them. đ Thanks!
35 comments
The struggles short men face daily.
Almost every TV dad is portrayed as an absolute imbecile and can not look after himself or the kids
Everything around men’s mental health just getting swept under the rug because we need to be a man and suck it up
I’d say we need more romcoms where the hero is actually a fuckboy who gets all the girls and then breaks their hearts, with realistic plots and “internal dialogue” of what goes inside his head
We are expected to be heroes and save the world but at the same time we are stupid
It seems like every time a man is any form of masculine male he is portrayed as either a moron or evil. I would love to see men portrayed more like the 007 characters from Pierce Brosnan back to Sean Connary. A man can be masculine and dress well, be well spoken, have manners, and intelligent.
Show men being capable and competent in what they do. Stop making them being a stepping stool or merely a plot device to prop up the women. ALL and I must stress this, ALL of my guy friends are where they’re at because they worked hard for it. NONE OF THEM ARE INCAPABLE OR INCOMPETENT, so showing ALL the men being the opposite really grinds my gears. How would women feel if they see other women in movies being nothing but a piece of ass for men to conquer?
I stopped watching modern movies a long time ago. One of the reasons why is because they portray men less than actual functioning human beings to prop up the women.
Handelling childens.
We are ALWAYS prortred as incapable of dealing with childes. Either by incompetence, going out talking milk or by being a child…
This is bad as 1) it is not babysitting and 2) all women are not naturaly good with childen…
You see the patriarcal problem here propagatig the Idea that women should be the one to sacrifice themselves ?
Fat Thor in Avengers Endgame. Imagine if they did that with one of the female characters lol the uproar would be so beautiful!!
Believable, flawed men overcoming challenges.
Ranging anywhere from hero saving the universe to a family man making it home for Christmas on time.
Less buffoons and incompetent morons being overshadowed by women with basic knowledge. The occasional nincompoop is fine but all the time? No. I turn off movies and shows because it’s so common. I’m over it.
I hate how most of the times a man shows any kind of phobia, like being afraid of heights or spiders or anything, it’s played as a comedic moment.
Like “this super muscular fighter guy is afraid to jump out of an airplane, hahaha”. Bonus points when a female protagonist flawlessly does the thing he’s afraid of to show her badassery.
Or the way physical strength and resilience are portrayed. Apparently, if you’re an average 1,75m guy, you immediately go unconscious when the protagonist punches you. But the ripped 1,95m guy can easily have 3 swords sticking through his chest and limbs without being bothered too much.
Or how men randomly fall in love with a pretty female character at first sight. Granted, some men are shallow. But they usually just look for hooking up. Most of us don’t actually fall in love just because of a pretty face. Especially when we’re older than mid twenties.
But most of the silly movie tropes aren’t gender specific.
From what I saw (mostly western media), most of the men are portrayed as 1. Dirty stinky stupid blokes (vast majority), or 2. Autistic maniac very clean and tidy (the very minority). I wish they portrayed men as just average people and not extreme characters.
The way that men are portrayed as horny beasts who constantly pursue sex and carnal pleasure. Itâs incredibly degrading. Not only that, but men are always seen as pursuing women and romantic relationships, declaring love openly, and chasing after a woman and âwinningâ her over.
All of this makes men seem pathetic and desperate, while making it seem as if women have some kind of âpowerâ over us. Itâs sickening and more men should be offended by it.
I really like how most of the comments so far fall under the common umbrella of ‘stop conveying hurtful stereotypes about men that ultimately lead to discrimination, prejudice and false expectations against men’. We’ve seen the writing on the wall about where the current trend has led us. Men are being vastly unappreciated and undervalued in the modern Western world and any minority seems to get a priority pass over standard men, no wonder men aren’t that motivated anymore.
Not that minorities shouldn’t be heard and given their legitimate place in society but there has to be a balance and at the moment it just feels like there is a war based on every single possible personal trait that can be squeezed for polarization of public opinion (gender, body type/body positivity, skin colour/ethnicity, sexual orientation etc.) And that standard males always end up being the bad guy that must be brought down in this war.
I wonder what kind of narrative is going to be conveyed next in the media to further divide society and of course brought up against men. Perhaps that standard men are bad for the environment because they eat more than women and midgets or something like that.
I remember reading that China is currently heavily invested in creating false social media accounts to bolster these dividing narratives, the more divided a society, the weaker it is, the weaker the Western world is, the easier it will be taken over by China. If and when war breaks out, I don’t think young men are going to be very motivated to go, fight and die to protect a society that has been blaming them and lowering their status for the past decades, and I don’t blame them.
I would like to see more shows where the male hero has no love interest whatsoever and doesn’t happen to find one at some pivotal time in his life.
I’d also like to have the male hero work with and or befriend women without falling for them or just making the woman a love interest.
Sorry ,the “will they, won’t they” part of any TV show is revolting to me.
Body positivity for men. I see it a lot with female characters, but not with male characters. If a male character is fat, short, bald, etc it’s played for jokes usually.
Men being screwed over by false accusations and divorces and how that effects society. Such as ignoring other peoples children or not going out alone with their own children, and how that changes socieities view of men.
1.) Stop showing men as incompetent/lazy parents/partners.
2.) When a man is helped/saved by a woman, stop making him needing to be saved into a character flaw in order to show the woman being a badass. Basically, media can prop women up without knocking men down
3.) Stop showing men being raped as a funny moment (often with a laugh track). Media loves showing a man being raped by a woman or in a prison as a funny moment. It isnât funny, and portraying it as a lighthearted scene does so much damage to male rape victims.
4.) Stop showing men as being primarily motivated by sex. Men donât always want sex, and our interactions with other people are not only based around how to have more sex. Men have the same overall motivations as women.
That in all stages in life, men have to just suck it up and learn the hard way. Our only true value is being a pay check.
Example: Look at social services, How many programs are out there for women and children? More to the point, what types of programs. Now look at the programs and availibility, to use thoes programs for men. There’s the mission; 10 to 20 beds all taken before you get there. and back to work, return to work, vocational training for work, drug rehab. (At a price) Even with these programs? Men, take to the back of the line. Women and children first. I’m not saying it’s wrong. You asked about what’s overlooked about men in movies. We are just a pay check. The only help you’ll get? Will be to help you become a better pay check. After all, you’re a man, suck it up.
The âdads are buffoonsâ thing is played out.
Bravery and honor
Competency.
Why is it in order to make women look smart men have to be emasculated, incompetent, lazy, wrong, superfluous etc.
Not because it makes men look bad, to me it makes women appear weaker.
**Dads**
It used to be father knows best. Now, every Dad is depicted as some helpless emotionally distant man child. I know very few men like that and have no respect for them
It’s not show or movies but commercials. Why is ever dad/father in every commercial goofy, incompetent, or just portrayed as outright stupid.
Saw one the other day. Dudes got a 50 lbs bag of mulch. There was a hole in it. He leaves a trail of mulch and walks up to the wife with an empty bag. He looks behind him to see the trail. She look at him like you idiot and they both laugh. You mean to tell me a man can’t tell the difference between 50 lbs and a piece of plastic.
Or in any commercials that a man has to father, he is just portrayed like it’s his first interaction with the 10 year old kid that’s supposed to be his kid. Dudes doing the moring routine with his kid. And can’t figure out how to use a brush or a hair tie in his daughter’s hair.
Shit pisses me off. Literally everyone of them make men look like complete ass.
Men in comedies constantly lying to their uptight wives to throw them off of whatever shenanigans theyâre getting into. Like what ever happened to marrying someone who could handle the truth? These guys are supposed to be relatable but as soon as they start spitting lies to their wife I just hate them. Also, their wives are usually inexplicably hotter than they are, which feels objectifying and vaguely gross
Due to cultures shifting in the US, I do believe that we have gone to the point where men were looked at as action heroes, to now being pretty much stupid imbeciles. There are so many shows that prop up the woman as somebody who is the logical thinker, and essentially the leader of the house or environment. I feel like I havenât seen one dad and a show really express emotion like real fatherâs for men do when they can open up. I wish they would show the mental strain and physical strain we have to go through most of the time not expressing it to anyone. Men suffer in silence about 90% of the time and no one cares because they are men. As if the super hero men of the past are still us today. Thatâs not the case.
short non white leads. Everyone is 6 foot even if they arenât irl. Even Tom cruise is 5â6 and portrayed in scenes as like a 6 foot machismo fighter pilot god. I would love to watch something about someone whoâs short but commands presence. Like a Kendrick Lamar (also 5â6 ish)
Short men are rarely portrayed as strong characters that everyone respects. They always seem to be clowns or something. And a lot of the time a short actor’s true height is obscured.
We need more heroes like Columbo.
Honestly if youve seen the show Ted Lasso, I think men are pretty realistically represented emotionally in that show.
When you have a dad that left a child behind with the mother, the father is almost always a complete deadbeat. You never see the mother preventing him from being in the child’s life or speaking about how he had to overcome the hurt of the divorce.
When dating they always show success and all the guy had to do was “just talk to her”. The girl is almost always receptive even if the guy looks like an idiot. The only effort the guy had to put into getting the girl was just being himself.
Healthy non transactional sexual relationship with loving partners. I can’t stand sitcoms for this.
Beaten down and abused husbands being protrayed as victims of abuse instead of as the butt of a poor, throwaway joke.
How women can be pushy creeps and horrible dates
How a guy out in public with his lil kids or nieces/nephews often gets dirty looks or people checking on the kids to make sure the guy isnât a stranger stealing them
The struggles of men figuring out how to be men in this weird modern era, and the mostly lack of appreciation of men in general society
That dads canât let the moms or the kids see any turmoil they are going through and they just need to power through it and get it done
The way erectile dysfunction and prison rape are handled as topics to joke about.