I (21F) have been seeing the dude (25M) for a while now. I can’t seem to ever read this guy. Sometimes he’s very clingy via text and other times I’m ghosted for weeks and even a month or so only for him to come back. We don’t do much sexually besides making out and oral so I guess it’s a FWB thing. But honestly? I can’t tell what this dude’s intentions are. Have you guys experienced something like this? Should I stop seeing him?
The only thing I’m weary about is that he’s the only dude I’m comfortable doing sexual stuff with at this time.
6 comments
girl 💀 if a guy is ghosting for weeks or a month i wouldn’t even bother calling him a situation-ship. he might not view it as fwb & maybe just a link up when he feels horny or bored type of thing. i thought you were gonna say he ghosts u for a few days.
u just need to ask him “why do u ghost me for weeks at a time”..or in general. “i’m just a bit confused on what this is and what your intentions are.” u don’t have to ask straight up like that but basically along the lines of it so you’re not beating around the bush.
I agree w the first comment. If he’s ghosting for multiple weeks at a time, doesn’t spend any time w you without anything sexual, he’s not interested in anything other than a hookup when it’s convenient.
He’s using you as standby..
This post hits a little too close to home cuz I was(am?) in a similar situation, just that the guy was older.
For my own sake I’ve stopped seeing him, or trying to text him to meet up. He just made me overthink and I didn’t like the thoughts and person I was becoming. Only if he suggests something/starts the conversation then do I consider meeting up. But honestly, I would cut him off completely if it was easier said than done. I’d advise you to do the same, or at least talk to him about the situation because you deserve better than this.
Since it’s a situationship and just kissing and oral, it’s very much a possibility that the dude is using you when he can’t get laid elsewhere.
I mean, as long as you know this isn’t progressing past fooling around when he’s interested in doing so, it is what it is.
I’m not sure what’s so confusing? When he’s feeling horny and lonely he hits you up. When he’s occupied, he doesn’t. It’s really simple. His intentions are probably to keep this same deal going until something else comes up.
If you think there’s a relationship at the end of this tunnel, there isn’t.
There’s nothing inherently wrong in this situation and only you can decide if you want to keep doing it or not.