I didn’t check my texts for more than an hour and saw two texts from my housemate and also my landlord. The first one, in her literal words: “I put your shoes in the garage until you get a chance to clean them because they’re making the entryway smell.” The second one: “nvm I put it back for now, can’t figure out where it’s coming from.”
There were no apologies for wrongly accusing me of having smelly shoes, nor even basic courtesy rules like politely asking me if she could put the shoes away. She just touched my stuff without even asking for permission and being a jerk about it. This is not the first time that such a thing happened – she always found a reason to complain and never in her interaction with me did she utter the word “please” or “could/would you”, although I have often been pretty polite to her from my end.
How should I communicate to her that I disapprove of the way that she texted me today without sounding unnecessarily aggressive?
5 comments
Say, “hey if you want me to move something just ask and I will do it”. She shouldn’t have touched your belongings but the way she texted doesn’t strike me as that bad to be honest.
That doesn’t sound so bad to me, as long as it it’s just a one-off.
this is gonna be an unpopular opinion, but i think you should let it go. i don’t think it’s okay that she was rude, it just seems like some ppl arent aware of their tone all the time through texts, often forgetting their manners completely. it reads to me as a flowing train of thought on trying to figure out where the smell is coming from, not personal to you. she may not have even realized you would be offended!
you said she has done this before: did it seem like she was intentionally accusing/disrespecting you and that’s why it’s bothering you so much? or is it the abrasiveness of picking up your shoes and moving them into the garage? like did she full force HURL your shoes at the wall and break a heel off or something? that warrants an in-person confrontation and my advice would be vastly different then, lol
There’s more going on between you two than what you’re revealing. Moving shoes and back isn’t rude, and doesn’t require a person to apologize. Pretty ridiculous to get so offended by that. You’re making a mountain out of a molehill.
Stop being annoyed by it. Her texts and actions were very reasonable and not impolite at all. If anything it was very nice of her to inform you that she moved it.