Guys who go to therapy – how long have you been seeing your current therapist?

17 comments

1. Two years now. Your therapist isn’t going to be offended if you want to try someone else. Other perspectives are good.

2. soon it’ll have been 3 years. i shared a lot of context with her that was valuable to not have to repeat.

   now that those things in the past have been adequately addressed, it could be beneficial to explore other options.

   when i first searched for therapists, i tried a few before finding someone with whom the interactions flowed better.

3. I saw a therapist for over a year to deal with some childhood trauma. That was 5 years ago. Since then, I have been to 3 different therapists, i didn’t see any of them for more than 6 visits. Im still seeking a new one.

4. Over one year. About to stop though. They have to hold you back in some way to remain a patient in my opinion. ‘Tis just how it works in the world I live in so far

5. This sounds like a miserable experience, I know I need therapy but I don’t have the patience and financial resources to go through this exercise, finding an effective therapist and re-devulging all my shit over and over. I know 100% what I need to do, I am just fighting off all the self-talk in my head that I cave into on any given day.

6. Have been seeing my current therapist off and on for 10 years. She’s awesome! I have seen 4 total therapists. The first one I ever saw was great but I eventually moved and had to find someone else. The next one was just ok but I didn’t have a ton of options. The third was terrible and I only went one time. Then I found my current therapist, who has been incredible. I saw regularly her for 3 years, then took basically a 5 year break (too long) and have been back at it the last 2 years or so.

   I do think it’s valuable to change your approach sometimes and I will probably do this too soon because I want to try EMDR, which was recommended by the therapist I have now.

7. About 6 months

8. Been with my current one since 2018 and had four others before that.

   Can safely say I’ll probably talk to this person for the rest of my life.

9. Think of a therapist as a mentor. They each have something different to offer. A different perspective, technique, or way to approach the way you experience the world. Some of these modalities will be helpful to your journey, and others less so. As the person with agency in your life, the goal is to work with this person until you have learned and integrated what they can offer, and at some point, you will have incorporated 90% of their teachings and be better served by learning a new way of approaching life. That’s when you switch. For some therapists it’s a year and others it is longer. But I do believe that 3 years is on the long end of things, since if they haven’t helped you work through your issues in 3 years in a way that is now feeling repetitive to talk with them, I’m not sure that you are actually taking all that much from the therapist, and would question if you ever will.

10. I’ve been to around 6 different therapists and still haven’t found anyone who can help me. Hopping around is common, don’t pay someone to help you if they aren’t.

11. Been working with my addictions counsellor for two years now. Sober 100+ days.

    Been with the same psychiatrist for 12+ years now. She’s adorable. She thinks I “just have OCD” lol. Yeah, okay. Really great person, and SO not like those other shrinks who just push meds. This woman actually listens to me and my problems, and never judged and dismissed me when I expressed some of my crazy views.

    Sometimes therapists and patients can reach an impasse. Sometimes, if a person has strong or “unpalatable” views, it can turn someone off. Therapists are people too. I remember one therapist I had to walk away from because she clearly thought I was a Nazi and she made these terrible faces when I talked!! LOL.

    I would do one of two things.

    1. Say “I feel like I am spinning my wheels a bit these days. Can we regroup and maybe identify some current issues and some short and medium range goals for me?”
    2. Say “I think it’s time to move on. You’ve helped me a great deal, but I think it’s time I test my wings for a while.”

    That’s all I got.

12. Almost 4 years. One of the best decisions in my life!

13. 3 years BUT we’re on and off when I need guidance on a specific issue. So I’ve only really seen them for like 3 months total throughout those 3 years.

14. A day. We’ll see how it goes and I’ll report back.

15. I saw a therapist for over five years during a divorce and after.

    My current one I’ve seen for a few months. I not sure I’m connecting with him and may change soon.

16. Almost 4 years now. I feel incredibly lucky that is worked out so well for so long

17. At least 4 years I think? I went to a different one originally but eventually we just weren’t clicking.