Single 30yr old dude here just looking for advice from others on how they deal with casually dating these days when they know their attachment style can effect the way things pan out. I think k I’m generally self aware and actively trying to be more chill, but its a slog.

6 comments

  1. I try my best, honestly. Therapy helps. I’ve also been slowly reading this book called “Attached” by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller, I highly recommend. It also helps to recognize thought and behavioural patterns and learning how to calm down your responses to situations when dating.

  3. Been getting better but honestly nothing is worse then waiting on a text. Nothing helps to relieve the stress until they respond or give up on them entirely. Its the worst feeling.

  4. Don’t exclusively date one person initially. I was recommended this by a therapist. It works because you don’t attach yourself too quickly and can logically assess whether a relationship is a good match.

  5. Reply I saw on /adv/ in regards to dealing with women and the ephemeral nature of dating:

    You do the thing that warriors, Buddhist monks,
    successful men and leaders have in common.
    You accept to lose everything all the time, for the
    sake of trying to live.
    You can still feel sad, and you shouldn’t LOOK to
    lose everything, but you accept it and live fully
    knowing that no matter how happy you are now,
    it could all be gone tomorrow.
    Only then will you be able to keep a girl around.

  6. I mean if you just mean you have to play it cool to a certain degree at the beginning, it’s been that way forever. You just have to practice. If you mean dating women who just want sex/aren’t looking to marry right now, don’t do that.

    Not a fan of weird jargon to describe normal personality types tbh, you’re talking about getting invested easy, not being crazy.

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