So I am in a bit of a pickle here. I don’t understand what’s wrong with me and hoping some of you have advice on this. I’m a male, 25, had ‘sex’ a few times but never ejaculated. Now I got myself a new girlfriend and I had to turn her sex requests down several times and she didn’t understand why and neither do I.
The weird thing is, I am not asexual. I have a foot fetish and we’ve done a lot of things with that, also me licking her vagina etc, but just the act of penetration, it doesn’t turn me on at all and I don’t really care about a vagina. The only thing that really matters to me is the feet and it seems to be the only thing turning me on. I’ve had this since I started masturbating, never even masturbated to the thought of sex or anything of the like.
So can this still be reversed? I could find a partner who is asexual but the woman I am with now I love very much and I just want to give her good sex. I am not into an open relationship or whatever, so my question here is, can I still become like attracted to it?
Or is this just going to be viagra and long foreplay and just be hard long enough to at least cum and pretend I like it for the rest of my life? I really want children so I need to be able to like have sex, I know some gay men have children and I think it’s the same for them, not attracted to the vagina so?
Idk, any ideas?
3 comments
The best thing I could think of is to try psychology. It’s what I had to do. I dont share your sentiment with feet. However, i do relate to not being turned on by things I should be, and wanting to provide. The thing that helped me most was association. Maybe try some porn that’s feet mixed with sex, see if you can kind of Pavlov yourself into associating sex with being turned on and orgasaming. More than anything, if it comes down to it and you really love this woman, an honest conversation can’t hurt. If it really bothers you, you could always try therapy, but I’d suggest trying to trick your brain first. Good luck hun /gen
So…how do you feel about dick? Or men in general? The answer may be much simpler than you’re thinking.
* There are definitely straight men out there, who don’t fetishize vaginas per se that much, but they enjoy the act of sex as a whole. Maybe you just need to have more vaginal sex to learn to appriciate it.
* Maybe a more playful mindset could help you. We tell ourselve, that we know what we like, but when we let got of our thoughts and are more in the moment, we learn, that there are new sensations, who also feel good.
* You can touch her feet during intercourse, maybe there is even a way, where you can penetrate her vagina through her feet.
* Sometimes reducing or giving up of porn consumption entirely helps us to reduce the intensity of fetishes.
* talking to your partner helps. If you can open up about how you feel, you are able to relax more and will therefore get harder erections.