TLDR: Is it rude to talk about my priveldged childhood with my friends that grew up in poverty?
So I (26f) had a pretty good childhood- middle class family, supportive and loving caretakers, etc. I recognize that and am super grateful (although it wasn’t without its share of trauma).
However, I joined a friend group (most 5-10 years older than I) over a year ago that collectively had a much different upbringing- impoverished, abused, etc.
I noticed recently that sometimes when I share stories about my life/childhood, my friends turn it into a kind of story olympics and make a point to 1-up me with a worse story. I’m not bragging during these times, just sharing about my life in relevant instances because that’s my lived experience that I’ve had.
This makes me feel a bit guilty for sharing said stories, so I usually go quiet for a while. Any advice?
Additionally: They’re great friends, very fun, smart, supportive, funny, and we love being in each others company. We hang out 2-3 times a week routinely.
1 comment
Well, trauma does weird things to the mind. Some people cope by talking about it, while trying to better themselves. But if they are telling stories just to 1 up you, thats a dangerous slope. There are people who never try to change, because they are proud of the trauma they survived and love bragging about it. If you sense they are the latter, then I would be careful, as your relationship grows with them, so may some elements of toxicity.