I (26F) seem to have terrible taste in men.
Despite being 26, i managed to go through all of life (high school, law school and adult life) without so much as feeling real attraction (excepting the very brief crush i had on a classmate at the age of 10).
A couple of years ago i met someone through mutual friends who i at least found attractive, (and who seemed to like me back) i was excited about having a first experience until he ghosted me (and also ghosted his friends !). After i got over the ghosting, i realized we were extremely incompatible anyway and he must have seen it too but i found the way he handled it immature and a bit cowardly.
Since then, a friend whom i respect and click with very much expressed interest but i wasn’t attracted to him physically and i didn’t want to hurt him by dragging it out only to realize i could never feel that way (we stayed friends and he was great about it).
Now i admit that having one disappointing experience isn’t enough to make that conclusion but i can’t help but feel that my instincts or reactions are off since i never seem to be able to feel attraction and when i do (even briefly) the guy turns out to be fake nice (this isnt even about being ghosted this is about how this man hurt his childhood friends who only ever had nice things to say about him…).
I’m not sure what I’m looking for on this sub. Maybe some perspective i guess ? Thanks to anyone who takes the time to reply !
Tldr: i never like any guy and the one time i did he turned out to suck
3 comments
Scumbags like him exist everywhere….. next you try to get into a relationship make sure you don’t fuck up
PS. I am rooting for you, be brave
Are you asexual? To never find anybody attractive seems odd. Do you enjoy self pleasure? Either that or your standards are through the roof.
My therapist helped me a lot with my terrible taste in men. She said you want butterflies, not fireworks. Fireworks are typically your trauma engaging and saying, “This is familiar and I find that exciting!” Butterflies build over time.
Painting with broad brushstrokes here, but it helped me a lot.